Botox or Mandrum

BC: Datuk, Datuk, we are dead la Datuk, we are dead la.

MB: I know, I know, I am breathing but I am as good as dead.

BC: How could this happen Datuk? Why did this happen Datuk? We were so strong.

MB: Before you go on I am warning you, if you blame my botoxing my face and lifting that bridge a bit, I swear I'll make Mee Jawa out of you.

BC: But Datuk, that was what all the other other Datuks are saying. They said they don't care if you want to botox your backside, but why do it now?

MB: It's the tempe I tell you; you don't believe me ka?

BC: But they said it's the botox. They swear they will stop botoxing their faces. They said botox brings bad luck. They have warned their wives with divorce if their wives continue to do it.

MB: Idiots, botox has got nothing to do with our defeat la. I tell you, somebody mandrum us already. We shouldn't lose; all indications from SPR said we will win. This one must be mandrum la.

BC: Mandrum ka Datuk? Aiyo that is more dangerous la.

MB: How?

BC: What if they also mandrum the botox to turn into Shelltox? Your face will detox la Datuk? Now what Datuk? That project you gave me how?

MB: Which project? I gave you so many what?

BC: The project to give all state employees free botox injections every 3 months?

MB: That one not yet sign , so cancel la.

BC: Aiyo, I lost so much money there la Datuk. I have already imported 3 containers of Botox. To get the AP I had to bribe so many officers plus the AP queen; now what I want to do; they are expensive you know.

MB: We all not yet sign why you import so fast?

BC: What about that other tender? The one to give a nose bridge lift and facial bleaching to all Kakitangan Cemerlang? I have already rented the shoplots and employed 20 plastic surgeons?

MB: You employed 20 plastic surgeons?

BC: No lar, actually beauty consultants la but if we call them plastic surgeons more oomph la Datuk. But now how?

MB: That one also not yet sign so it's off.

BC: Aiyo, Datuk, I am dizzy la, dizzy.

MB: You think you alone dizzy ka? I am not dizzy ka? You should not be worried about those deals that are not signed yet, you should worry about all the projects that you have completed and have been paid for.

BC: Why Datuk? Why should I worry about them? All paid for already what? You also got your cut already?

MB: All of them are illegal la. The land we took are all robbed from the people. All the deals did not get any approval. The money paid are all meant for other things. The broom factory you set up is built on state land without a permit.

BC: Aiyo, I am more dizzy now. How Datuk? Now how?

MB: I don't know how you intend to do it but I suggest you get a few people and go to the State Secretariat and shred and destroy all the files there. Every single piece of paper must be shredded and take out all the computers.

BC: I can take the computers ka Datuk? I can sell second hand.

MB: Idiot, you only think of making money, even in times like this. Take them just get rid of the hardisks, that's all and one more thing, ask the doctor who did my plastic surgery and botox to destroy all my files and move to Perth. In the meantime, I will make myself scarce for a few days.

* BC = Ball Carrier

Mandrum = Black magic