Tuesday, 25 March 2008

Diary

Damn shit, what is this I hear that Madet is taking that ABIM boy into UMNO? Doesn't he know that that boy is bad news for UMNO? Anyway, if he gets into UMNO where does that put me? I mean I can't talk like that boy, he'll overshadow me for sure. Where does that put me in Penang? Very soon he'll take over me in Penang and once that happens there is just no way for me to mount an attack on him. Shit this is no good.

Shit Madet did it again. Now he is giving that ABIM boy an unobstructed passage as head of UMNO youth. He'll sit with the bosses and I the more senior would still be sitting far from them. Shit this is no good. I don't think I can last long as Penang head. Very soon it is going to be Anwar. Then the press would be going Anwar this and Anwar that, what about Abdullah? Who is going to care about Abdullah? Fate? Aaah, shit fate.

What is this? I hear Ku Li wants to challenge Madet? Could this be the answer to my daily prayers. Now, lets look at the present scenario. Yes, Madet is all powerful but Ku Li is not without support. As someone very senior with his stints in Trade and Finance, he must have his people who would back him up all the way. I hear he has been going round buying up division chiefs. With Musa's backing and Rais and Radzi I think he is strong enough. I hear even Najib is contemplating of joining him. Who has Madet got? The press and AIDS. That's all. The others? Aah, they are mosquitoes, too small. Okay I'll flip a coin, heads I join Ku Li, tails I ditch Madet, hehehehe.

Damn that Najib. He is a real lalang. The damn bastard played us out at the last minute. Shit, have I burnt my bridges? No I don't think so. Luckily I am not a fiery orator like Anwar otherwise I would be the first one Madet will go for. Anyway, I did not talk much and Madet couldn't possibly ditch us all. He'll have to keep some otherwise who has he got? What do I do? Do I stay or join Ku Li's 46? I think I'll stay. Who knows, my luck would change with UMNO Baru? Anyway, Anwar is getting too powerful and knowing Madet, I don't think he digs that.

Ha, serve you right Anwar. Blue eyed boy eh? Now see what happens to you? You dare try to side-step Dollah? Ha, ha, ha. I don't think Anwar is going to keep quiet and that would make Madet to go for the kill and I will lay quietly in waiting. Anwar's man would definitely get it too. Even if they were to side Madet, they would still be looked upon suspiciously and since I have distanced myself from Anwar who knows I would get the nod? Hey Anwar, why don't you rot in prison? ha, ha, ha, ha.

Good, the Reformasi has done a lot of damage and whether the old man likes it or not he will have to take the blame. Many are silently calling for him to step down but the division created by Anwar can't see UMNO having another leadership crisis. He must go and it must be seen to be a retirement, not a booting out. Sheesh, that old man is really slimy. Imagine crying on TV in front of millions and that drama queen Rafidah putting up an award winning performance. Now got to stop the spanner from hitting the wheels. We'll give him a little bit more time before going for the kill but first must take care of Najib. Razak did get Madet back into UMNO and Madet is grateful for that. Let's hope that he doesn't treat this as his father's country and name Najib as his successor. Must get SIL to do something about it.

Aaaaaah, at last. At last I am King. Oooh it feels so good. What is that song by Louis Amstrong? "I feel good". I better stop singing. Even my own ears hurts. Must get SIL to chart my progress and future. He is defintely a brilliant boy. He, is an Oxford product man. He even passed economics in Oxford, something I couldn't do in UM.

Boy, I am lucky having SIL with me. All my job is taken care of for me and I still have time for golf and naps whenever I choose to. The best part is that no one can do anything about it because SIL will see to it that they keep their mouth shut. Glad to see that Kamal's business is doing good. That Patrick fellow is a real good influence. I thought Kamal knows nothing about economics but I guess I am wrong.

What is this I hear? Mahathir making noise about my governance? Why? Just because I scrapped his Scenic bridge and got my people into important places, he must go smear my name in public? I'll get him if that is the last thing I do. Luckily I released Anwar; that gives Madet another enemy. Must get the MSM to do something about this and must get them to do some public relations work to make me look good.

Shit these bloggers. They are trying to derail my plans. I know it's Madet's man doing all these but others are following. Even those who hates him are joining in the bandwagon. They do not know that this is Madet's agenda and it's working and my men are not doing any good by taking them on. It only make my men look stupid. Why must I have men like Zam and Adnan? Why is everyone conspiring against me? Even oil traders are conspiring against me. The price of crude is too high. If I raise the price of petrol I am dead If I don't where do I find the dough to feed those hungry cronies?

Aaah, unkept promises, rising cost of living, demonstrations, SPR, HINDRAF, Mahathir, Anwar, bloggers. Lingam, risng crime, and that idiot SIL. I can't take it, I can't take it. I don't care, I'll call for an election before Anwar is eligible. Elections it is. When, when? Ah shit 8 March.

Oh, I am having a headache. Wow, its like a ten ton lorry ramming into my head. What happened, what happened? 5 states? I don;t believe it. Damn those 4th floor boys, they make me think its safe. Damn them, damn all. Whats this. Raja picked Md Isa Sabu? Shit I gave Shahidan the appointment letter so why must the Raja go against me? Come to think of it, I did want to drop Shahidan so I'll just keep quiet and let it take its course. People won't say I derhaka. Anyway this is an isolated case. Good riddance Shahidan. What Agong don't want Idris? Hey, what is this? Don't they know I am The PM. Hey, show me some respect you guys. Is this the way to treat the Prime Minister? Mukhriz, Shahidan, Ku Li and now Terengganu? What's going on man and where is that piece of shit SIL when I needed him most? No, I will fight the Agong, derhaka or not.

What happened? Terengganu fell? What? Malaysia fell?

16 comments:

tokasid said...

This Trengganu shit is really making me nervous.Natang! Now, who wrote that Natang word on that banner in KT? Shit. And why did that stupid TV3 show that banner on the news?

Now that Natang word is making things difficult for me. Luckily najib and Ali Rustam were with me during the meeting with those derhaka and kurang ajar Adun from my party. I have to do something so that Najib and Ali will take the blame.

I have no choice. I once hated me so much but I think only he can save me now. No! Not Madet laa...Its Anwar. He has to help me out.That is if he wants to be PM. I'd rather Anwar than that lalang Najib.That Najib has no backbones. I remember he used to say he setia with Anwar and with Madet and with me. So lalang-like.

Hahaha...Australia is a good place to stay. I am grateful to Pat. He gave me his house here in Aussie. No,not the one exposed by those bloggers.Its a new one. No one knows where it is.Not even SIL. Not even Kamal.Only Pat knew and he promised he won't tell SIL or Kamal.

I don't know what I'll do here in Kangarooland. Nasi Kandar is out of the question. bakery? Nah! Thats for that old Madet only laa...I mean come-on la..do I look like a bai Roti?

Since I ran off from Malaysia I have no income.No pension. No gratiuty or what ever. But thats okay with me.I still have my skin on.

Those Malaysian are one gila rakyat. How can they demand me to be arrested with the ISA?For what? Derhaka to the Sultan Trengganu and Agung. Rakyat said I was like Al-maunah.Some said I and Derih was worse than Al-Maunah.
Don't they know its unconstituitional to arrest me? Go and arrest Derih la.Or Najib too.

Remember when I said I wanted Anwar to help me? Cilaka that Anwar. He refuse to help me. He said let the UMNO members decide my fate.He said Malaysian had outrightly rejected me. And you know what else he said? He said he like if KuLi challenged me!Apa ke jadah ni?

Jeanne? Oh..she went out this morning .Will be back at 5pm I think. Thank ALLAH she manage to get a partime job at a diner in this small town. Basuh pinggang mangkok only.Of course we don't need that job but we don't want the locals to be suspicious you know. Not working yet living lavishly.Let the locals scratch their heads how we manege to live like a President with a cuci pinggang mangkok job.My dear Pat will not let me down.

acciaccatura said...

aiyo, terengganu got no more rotan, so akaq also can do lah.
hey?? ...just now got only one akaq, suddenly got 22 akaq???

Kata Tak Nak said...

Doc,
Aiseyman, who let the press know about this place in Australia? Susah, everyday the press come. Now Utusan and Berita Harian also want to whack me. Cilaka betoi.
Must move la, where?
Aah, yes, Papua New Guinea, they won't look for me there.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Accia,
Dah ada 22 akaq ka?

acciaccatura said...

heehee...yang 22 akaq tu nama saja akaq, tapi sebenaqnya lalang!

cakapaje said...

Salam Cikgu,

Akaq or no, 22 bad fengshui ma...just like 13; 2+2=4, 1=3=4 also! Sei! Sei! Aiyah! Ini matcam ameno mati lor...

monsterball said...

Shit!! The diary is as confusing as the blog owner.
The more I read...the more I get confused.
I guess...this is the season where hantutelur can fly in...and give kata tak nak..a lesson or two...in having a diary that should be written with no "puns" and "ifs" or "buts".
But me no buts..will have to pass on and see what others will say.
However....I am sure Anwar will not care two hoots ....what other think of him now..as he is riding high....up up away...happily.
That much ....Anwar now deserve....after 6 years eating nasik lemak kosong for nothing.
The truths are unfolding to us..faster than we can comprehend.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

hehehehe...diary of a sleepy hollow i must add. Anwar's against him, DrM, then the Rakyat and now even Ku Li. i'm sure quite a few others but would rather stand behind him to save their own ass.

eh cikgu, did it actually cross his mind to turn his back against drM? i was only 12 la back then my only interest were Star Wars' collectable figurines.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Shah,
What 22 bad Feng Shui ka? Must stay away from that number and number 13 and number 8 and number 3 and people named KJ and Dol and Samy. I must put samy's name here la coz I am beginning to miss him already.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Monty,
This is a different diary, this diary would be worth millions if found.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Kerp,
Oh yes, he was with Team B under Ku Li and Musa. They fought Team A under Mahathir and Ghafar Baba. Funny though before he retired Mahathir sacked all of his team A big wigs. He sided Anwar to take on Ghafar who later withdrew. Then he sacked Daim, Sanusi and Anwar.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

good info cikgu. thanks. funny thing is, even now Ku Li is going against him.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Kerp,
Politics is a game without rules, friends become foes and vice versa. All affiliations are mostly for convenience.

hantutelur said...

Chegu,

Enty #10 (from "shit these bloggers---"), #11, #12 seem unreal - or was not written by the diarist.

He was, before the election and is still now, delusioned with his own lies and his advisers' false assurances. That explains his non action to tackle issues and erratic decisions (and refusal to step down -- he is not pressured enough to step down).

Those entries are more likely sound as follows:-

1. What me worry about blogger? They are liars, women and jobless...

2. I trust and rely on Zam and Nazri to counter the attacks by bloggers and foreign media. Mat Mat is also a great fighter...

3. Raising the price of petrol is not a problem to Malaysians because ours are still cheaper than most countries...

4. Barang naik is unavoidable because of *3* (above) and everybody knows that for a fact....

5. SPR is clean, our electoral system is example to other nations. We are going to do exactly the same thing we have done before and nobody can proof anything, that's why I decide to extend Achid's service...

6. Hindraf's demands are ridiculous. A million for each Hindu? hah...

7. Mahathir is a has-been...

8. Anwar is a foul mouthed liar...

9. SIL still offers valuable advices...

10. Musa is doing a good job...

11. Lingam's not my problem but Madet's...

12. Having election on 8th March is a good thing (but shit, it didn't occur to me that Nuar can always get his wife to warm his bed first before he jumps in)...

13. Losing 5 states? I still have 8. It's not that people hate me, but it is because I did not push the progress fast enough...

14. And the Raja and the Sultan has to abide to the constitution (can anyone tell me again, is it really the head of state's pregorative to elect his MB or mine?)... ooops should apologise to the king later....

15. Omigod! Now who wrote the word "natang" on the banners? I already told them not to quote... it's off the record. Shit!

monsterball said...

Good-morning KTN and all.
I am reading and waiting.....hahahahahha

zorro said...

Chegu, with your strategising and deft maneuvering Sir Alex is having cold sweat!!!!!

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