Saturday, 17 September 2011

Kicap Cap Sia

Manager: Boss, I am sad to report that our sales have dropped quite a lot la.

Boss: I know and that worries me. Do you have any ideas on what to do?

Manager: I don't know la boss. Everything we do just didn't catch fire la.

Boss: Let me see the product again. Hmmm! I know, lets change the name of the product, add more colours.          get a catchy name.

Manager: You mean a new product?

Boss: Sort of.

Manager: I don't get you

Boss: Instead of Kicap Cap Isa, we change it to Kicap Cap Sia. Just add a little more Ajinimoto inside, change the labeling to make it attractive and offer a bigger bottle for the price of the old one.

Manager: Do you think the people would buy it?

Boss: Do you have any other idea?

Manager: What about close shop?

Saturday, 10 September 2011

Please don't go!!!!!!!

Mat: Please, please don't go. Where am I going to find another partner like you? Please. Don't you cherish all the good times we had together?

Dollah: Noooooo! I'd rather die than to be without you please, don't go. Please, please, I can't take this.

Samad: What is life without you? If you must leave, then please take me with you. I've never had a partner like you before.

John: No, we have to go. It saddens us to go what with your tin and rubber but we must leave. Remember, you were never colonised, you were a partner, an equal partner. You have been independent all this while. Thanks for your gifts of rubber and tin. Her Majesty sincerely appreciated it. Bye-bye partner. Remember, whatever people may say about our relationship, one day a chosen one by the name of KELING would clear the air.

Wednesday, 7 September 2011

Sorry la Datuk

Journalist: Sorry boss, I can't go la, my daughter is sick, get someone else la please.

Chief: Aiseyman, where to find replacement, after all, it is only a few hours work. Kampung Baru only, near your house what.

Journalist: Cannot la boss, my wife will be angry la, please la boss. When have I ever refused you assignments? This time betul-betul cannot la boss.

Chief: Where to find people ah? You are the 18th person who turned down this assignment. Usually you all would be pestering me to go because of the free makan and allowance.

Journalist: You go la boss, got chance to be buddy buddy with the VIP.

Chief: Actually I want to go but my grandmother is getting married. What to do ah? Okay la, I'll call the VIP and let him know that we can't send anyone. ....... Hello, Datuk, Bernama here, we can't send the 500 journalist that you requested to go to Kg Baru this evening la, sorry la Datuk. What? 490 also can? I can't even get 1 la Datuk. Please don't be angry at me la Datuk Azeez.

Saturday, 3 September 2011

UMNO Parrots and the Communists.

Mat Sabu said something about the communist attack on Bukit Kepong under British rule, which means, it was a British police-station. UTUSAN MELOYA spins the story to make it look like Mat Sabu had glorified the commies and then out came some of the most stupid Malay parrots and began to condemn Mat Sabu to the extend of calling those who saw no wrong with what he had said as commie worshipers.

I am so ashamed of these Malays who tried to sound educated but are truly so damn bloody stupid as to give credence to what UTUSAN had spun. Now I am going to accuse these arseholes of something which they are going to vehemently deny because it is not going to look pretty on their masters. These arseholes are actually racists of the lowest kind.

They are not actually mad at communism, they are actually mad at Chinese communists. I am not going to dwell much on what Sabu had said because it has been amply documented. What I am going to touch on is the hypocritical ways of these arseholes.

First let me reiterate that I am no commie lover, lest those morons start calling me one. They denounce the communist regimes as evil when the regime that they glorify at home is no better. Let me show you a few examples of the hypocrisies of these arseholes.

In a comminist regime, the masses, meaning the ordinary folks, have no access to information. All channels of information is controlled by the regime. Here in this country, the kampung folks who incidentally speak no English, are fed with news from MELOYA, and the Media Prima group. Where do they get access to alternative news? They are being prevented from getting the real news. So commie like.

In a commie regime, those accused by the regime of any wrongdoings are never allowed to explain themselves to the masses. Here it is the same. Was Sabu ever allowed the space by MELOYA and the Media Prima froup to explain what he had said? It is a big NO. Reminds of of the communists?

In a commie regime, the concentration of wealth is within the party politburo and those connected to them and what is the difference with what is happening in this country?

In a commie regime, protests, no matter how peaceful are brutally treated and we know what met the protesters in BERSIH and BERSIH 2.

I am in no mood to go on any longer because it nauseates me. All I want to say to these few parrots is please try to be original. Just because MELOYA said something doesn't mean you have to parrot it, It just shows your stupidity.


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