Friday, 25 April 2008

Who Says we are not going to space?

Min: Mr. Putin sir, regarding our second cosmonaut, the agreement still stands right?

Putin: Second cosmonaut? Was there a first?

Min: Yes, don't you remember Muzaphar?

Putin: Oh, that bone doctor, he was a space traveller, not a cosmonaut. Please be careful with what you say, we have a reputation to keep.

Min: Sorry, sorry Mr. Putin sir, it won't happen again. So the deal still stands?

Putin: The deal was for one man, if you want one more than you must buy more from us, simple as that.

Min: Ah, we are experiencing some hard times here so would you accept our credit? Soon as things get better, we will buy.

Putin: Many countries are waiting in line you know. You could always pay US25 million to send him there.

Min: I know that sir, but we are experiencing a tight squeeze so the treasury said it is not wise to spend that much for a tour.

Putin: I am sure you could foot it yourself without asking the treasury. You made quite a bundle from the last deal.

Min: I would have if I have the money but you know, there are so many poor people here and I can't bear to see them suffer so I spent all the money on them.

Putin: Yes, Bush is a genius. Israel loves Islam and Mahathir doesn't lie.

Min: Is there anyway we can discuss this sir?

Putin: I tell you what, you come over and bring that Mongolian chick here with you.

Min: Er, er, what Mongolian chick sir?

Putin: The one you brought to see me when we were discussing the last deal.

Min: Er, I can't remember which one sir.

Putin: Remember that day in my office when I gave you 4 pounds of C4 as souvenir? There was a Mongolian chick with you.

Min: Oh, that chick, oh, sad news sir. she was playing with the C4 which she stole from me and evaporated.

Putin: Evaporated? Does she know how to use it? It doesn't go off just like that you know. Its a pity you've got to waste a beauty like that. So what else do you have to offer?

Min: How about a ride in our submarine?

Putin: What! That second hand junk? You must have been losing your touch.

Min: Could you then lend us some of your CGI experts then? We will make it look like the major went to space.

Putin: I think I can arrange that. It will cost you US1 million for 2 CGI experts. Don't worry, they could even make it look like he was on Mars.

Min: Okay, my wife's company will handle the arrangements then. Thank you sir.

Putin: Okay bye.

Min: Sayang, how would you like to make a fast US4 million?


monsterball said...

Creative usual.
But if you do not mind...I think it was done in bad taste...using that dead Mongolian if she was a prostitute. It is a world class case ...showing the case is political motivated..and lets give some pity to the father and her love ones.
Lets learn to feel for well as be brave and sincere.. to tell the truths.
Have a nice coming.. week-end.
I never watches a worst football game for long time...seeing MU against two school teams playing. Watched Ronaldo face expression...before taking the penalty....worried if he off..break a promise...not to score at all!!
Bookies know MU will win...on second leg..come it may be another go for penality kicks...saving bookies loosing...all betters go home empty handed.
By the way kerp..very good news for disabled...getting more jobs in government.

tokasid said...

Minwife; US4 million? Macamana tu darling? Darling kena ekoq ke?

Min: Not like that lah darling. Its from the space travel programme. Mr Putin is willing to let us have his CGI experts...

MinWife: What for?

Min: You know we can't afford the ticket for our space traveller anymore but we need to show to the world we are capable.Just look 2 weeks ago that Korean lady also went to outer space.

MinWife: why the CGI experts? We need to buy them before sending our guy to space again? And I think this time we need to send a lady lah pulak. Why should it another man?

Min: need the CGI to make believe esp to our rakyat that we really got guys up there in space.not 1. We can ask them to make like we send one football team there. We'll make it look like we not only send up men but women too. Maybe the bapoks too...and not forgeting the Mat Rempits.Just imagine a mat rempit in outer space....

MinWife: But darling...why CGI experts from Russia? We can always call George Lucas to do it..maybe cheaper than the Russians.And we will get more from that 4 million sayang.

Min: No...if we take george Lucas,Bush might get to know of our bluff and knowing Bush he might blurp it all over the world.

MinWife: Hah! I got it darling. We can gain more if we do it locally. In fact we can make US4.75 million out of it..

Min: Really? Such a brilliant idea sayang.Where do we get this guy?

MinWife: There's a Mongolian guy staying in Jinjang.He goes by the name Jinjang Genghis Tuya. They say he once made CGI about some one blown up by a bomb!

Mr.Right said...

Muhahhahaha....lawak kejam, lawak kejam. Ini lah namanya tembak beberapa burung dengan seketul lawak. Bijak...bijak...

BERANI.... aku kagum.

Zawi said...

Who says we have a space programme? It was just a one off to justify the huge cost of the arms purchase by the government so that the excess payment doesnt look obscene.
Malaysia will go down the drain if we continue spending our money the way these jackass are doing.
Hopefully YB. Lim Guan Eng how to rule a government efficiently maximiing return from scarce resources.

cakapaje said...

Salam Cikgu,

Can't really remember how this goes, but its something like this:

Hey diddle diddle,
The cat and the fiddle,
The cow jumped over the moon:
The little dog laughed
To see such sport,
And the dish ran away with the spoon

Now, who the cat, the cow, the little dog and even the dish and spoon, you decide :)

Kata Tak Nak said...

Well, she is not that innocent you know though she doesn't deserve the ending.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Silap-silap, Najib nanti buat dia lawan dengan Alien sekali untuk election lagi satu.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Mr. Right.
Aku lebih rela lawan dengan hampa di Final, kalau kami masuk la, daripada lawan dengan team Chelsea tu.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Malaysia's space programme is the most advance. Even the US are sending their people here to study about space travelling.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Why give so susah one? I ni bukan la pandai sangat.


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