Tuesday, 29 April 2008

kawan makan kawan

Samy: Hello! Itu Toyo ka?

Toyo: Oi, India, Mohd Khir la, apa Toyo, Toyo ni?

Samy: Itu, awak punya nama jugak kan? Apa pasai mau marah? Banyak sedap apa.

Toyo: Hey Samy, kalau awak tak tau panggil saya punya nama betul betul, saya letak ini talipon sekarang jugak.

Samy: Oh, tak suka sama itu nama ya? Nanti saya cakap awak punya bapak. Ha ha.

Toyo: Oi, Samy sudah kalah lagi mau talipon orang ka? Duduk rumah diam-diam la, tengok itu Astro Vaanavil.

Samy: Oi Toyo, sapa cakap saya kalah? Saya bukan kalah la, saya tadak menang saja.

Toyo: Oi, apa awak mau call sama saya?

Samy: Apa pasai awak pigi cakap sumua orang saya suruh diaorang roboh itu kowil? Itu kowil sudah roboh kan, apa pasai saya mau suruh roboh lagi? Bodoh punya orang. Oh, awak mau cari itu kambing hitam ka?

Toyo: Oi Samy awak sudah lupa ka? Itu hari awak cakap itu HINDRAF sudah bikin itu kuil diaorang punya headquarters? Awak sendiri yang suruh saya roboh. Apa sudah lupa ka? Itu hari awak mabok ka?

Samy: Oi, tempe! apa cakap mabok. Ini Samy la, satu tempayan toddy minum pun tak boleh mabok punya la. Saya mau esok jugak awak cakap sama itu surat khabar punya orang awak sudah silap cakap.

Toyo: Awak gila ka Samy? Mana boleh cakap saya silap. Pernah ka mana-mana orang BN cakap dia ada bikin silap? Awak sudah lupa ka apa Mahathir ada cakap dulu? Dia cakap, bila sudah silap, sampai mati pun jangan mengaku.

Samy: Itu saya tadak puduli, sekarang saya punya nama sudah banyak busuk. Itu India punya orang lagi binci sama saya. Diaorang cakap saya roboh kowil. Awak mau apologise ka ta mau?

Toyo: Oi mabok, dari dulu lagi awak punya nama sudah busuk la. Awak punya badan pun busuk juga. Awak menjerit berapa kuat pun saya apa peduli? Saya tak mau tukar saya punya cerita.

Samy: Oi botox, awak tadak tukar itu cerita, awak punya cerita sumua saya kasi kuluar.

Toyo: Oi puteh! Saya pun ada banyak cerita tentang awak. Try la.

Samy: Nanti saya cakap sama Pak Lah baru awak tau.

Toyo: Dia boleh buat apa sama saya? Dia sendiri pun sudah mau jatoh.

Samy: Tak aci la ini macam, kawan makan kawan.

36 comments:

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

samy memang cakap tak serupa bikin. DSAI can testify to that. the former promised to get him a pair of expensive shoes...dari semenjak anwar dalam cabinet lagi sampai lah la ni...haram...

Unknown said...

Kerp,
Yes, I read about that or I saw a video about it. He is cornered, but you have got to give him something la, he is not going to go down without a fight but he simply refuse to accept that his stubbornness would destroy MIC once and for all.

Anonymous said...

"Awak sudah lupa ka apa Mahathir ada cakap dulu? Dia cakap, bila sudah silap, sampai mati pun jangan mengaku."

Aiyoo..bukan Mahathir sudah mengaku dia sudah buat silap itu Anwar punya kes ka?

tokasid said...

Toyo: Saya mana ada makan kawan?

Samy: Tadak ka? Abis awak ada cakap saya juga kasi mau roboh kovil! Itu tadak makan kawan ka?

Toyo: Dei Samy! Saya ana ada kawan sama awak?

Samy: Ayoyo....tadak baik itu macam cakap.Dulu awak sama saya kamcing juga.Awak ada ingat ka ada satu kali awak ada panggilsaya Uncle Samy...tadak ingat ka?

Toyo: Dei Samy!Itu bukan saya panggil awak la...

Samy: Habis? Sapa itu Uncle Samy kalu bukan saya?

Toyo: Itu saya panggil saya punya garderner laa....

Toilet paper said...

salam

Toyo: oi samy, lu jgn mau mara lagi la..

Samy: khir, apa pasal tida mau mara?? itu ari suda janji juga mau bagi share duit babi..sekarang kalah apa mau bagi??

Toyo: Dun worry la brader..ada duit dari Balkis apa..itu duit suda masuk akaun di australia apa..nanti kita jumpa di New Zealan serupa Lingam punya holiday..

Samy: ok..janji tau..

Toyo: Dun worry brader..kalu saya janji srupa itu janji BN la..(hehehe)

Samy: ala..itu janji banyak susa apa..

Anonymous said...

Toyo: Hello dei!,dulu lu juga kata kasi mati tu Hindraf..banyak degil punya India tad da sama itu MIC punya kulit..apa pasal sekarang lu mau mati mati kasi Hindraf BOSS tu keluar ISA.Ini macam dei tarak bagus.

Samy: Lu apa kurang..dulu you pun cium itu buntut Pak Lah..semua okay..satu pun tak da salah.Lu mau ingat nanti itu Khalid bawak you punya bini masuk court..mana you mau sapa tolong kalu bukan ini great Samy..

Toyo: Ini macam saya jumpa paper esok kasi tau itu kuil bukan you suruh..lu kasi tau itu paper semua ahli MIC sokong penuh tindakan saya punya bini. Boleh ke ini macam..

Samy: Ini macam ada sikit tolak ansur..tak de la kawan makan kawan....

Anonymous said...

Toyo: Hello dei!,dulu lu juga kata kasi mati tu Hindraf..banyak degil punya India tad da sama itu MIC punya kulit..apa pasal sekarang lu mau mati mati kasi Hindraf BOSS tu keluar ISA.Ini macam dei tarak bagus.

Samy: Lu apa kurang..dulu you pun cium itu buntut Pak Lah..semua okay..satu pun tak da salah.Lu mau ingat nanti itu Khalid bawak you punya bini masuk court..mana you mau sapa tolong kalu bukan ini great Samy..

Toyo: Ini macam saya jumpa paper esok kasi tau itu kuil bukan you suruh..lu kasi tau itu paper semua ahli MIC sokong penuh tindakan saya punya bini. Boleh ke ini macam..

Samy: Ini macam ada sikit tolak ansur..tak de la kawan makan kawan....

amsran said...

samy: allo!! toyol ka?

toyo: aah!!! orang minyak, toyo lah bukan toyol!!!

samy: ayo!! jangan marah. silap cakap sikit saja. u lagi panggil saya orang minyak! manaada saya orang minyak.

toyo: ok! ok! u telepon sama saya apa hal..

samy: saya telepun sama u, mahu buka ladang kinzir di sungai siput.

Unknown said...

masismy,
Yang mahathir kata dia silap ialah amik dollah. Dia tetap kata dia tak silap dalam kes anwar.

Unknown said...

Doc,
Samy: Oh lu cakap lu tadak kawan sama saya ka? Saya manyak sedeh la ini macam. Sini orang ta mau kawan sama saya, sana orang ta mau kawan sama saya, saya punya tokong pun ta mau tengok saya punya muka, lebeh baik saya balik India jadi filem star belakang jadi Chief Minister Tamil Nadu.

Unknown said...

Toiletpaper,
Samy: Janji BN kalu sampai mati pun saya ta mau.

Unknown said...

anonymous,
Samy: Adei toyo, bila jumpa paper punya orang punya jam, lu sikit cakap la itu Samy banyak baik punya orang, banyak tolong orang susah.

Toyo: Buleh tu, tapi awak bagitau la orang yang saya kulit cekang ni sebab tempe bukan botox.

Unknown said...

amsran,
Samy: Hey Toyol, lu jangan kasi rosak sama itu Sg Siput ha. Saya tak mau itu babi sumua. Mau buka itu ladang wudumbu buleh.

Toyo: Apa itu wudumbu?

Samy: Wudumbu itu biawak la.

monsterball said...

Friends become enemies and vice versa.
Liars trying to outwit each other...all from BN now.
Never have UMNO and BN stoop so low...only after the election and lost 5 States...now passing the buck....blaming each other.
Mahathir is very happy..seeing UMNO is so weak...and he is adding salt to the wound..by blaming all on Dollah.
Poor poor Dollah.....receiving endless accusations..for 5 years...and now Mahathir greatest enemy Tunku Razaleigh has become TDM long lost brother.
Is not..UMNO guys full of shit??
Indonesia..Signapore...Thailand...all call them arrogant people...but wise Lee Kuan Yew said....they are weird guys.
Let Toyo and Samy .....two biggest liars and corrupted blokes..go fight each other..who cares.....but Toyo need to be proven corrupted by Kahlid soon. I think he is holding back informations...as he has no confidence of the police and judicial people yet.

monsterball said...

And on football...MU will beat Roma and go to the final.
MU must win ONE cup...and I suspect bookies will make all betters bleed with MU loosing the Leaque Cup to Chelsea.
One game need to be properly fixed..to hentam betters!!
MU/ROMA...gone case for ROMA....all know that..so let MU go to the final...and then sit back and plan another kill.
Malaysians bookies are in great trouble...since keDAILan took over Selangor State.
Sir Fucking Fuggie..is the biggest manager crook in English football.
He made millions lost bets...on the CHELSEA /MU game...choosing a weak team. He did that so many times..making monsterball lost all hard earned money to bookies. Fuck him!!

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

cikgu,

time i hand out the award, and you're one of the recipients. do save it from my blog and paste it here because everyone must know this blog is rated excellent. simply because it is! yang ada gambo teddybear tu tak payah ambik la...hehehe...yg Excellent tu je.

Anonymous said...

wah....

toyol: apa ni sammy
sammy: apa la lu..
toyol: apa pesanan kamu wahai tuanku sammy?

sammy: ko pgi curi itu tenggiling si amsran

toyol:....??????

amsran said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
amsran said...

toyo: daripada buka ladang Wudumbu, baik buka ladang belukun.

samy: apa itu belukun?

toyo: Belukun serupa sama kita punya kawan.. tengiling lah itu binatang!!

samy: @#$%^& ????

monsterball said...

MU against Barcelona la...not Roma!!
And MU is through to the final!!
It will be an all English teams final!!
International bookies are real smart.
Sir Fucking Fuggie...will have dinner with them secretly.

Sue.Aleen said...

let them fight, kalo tak asyik cari salah PR je mcmla sapa yang sokong PR ni bukan warganegara.

tak membina ummah sungguh. dua-dua sama je. tak nak ngaku silap sendiri tapi suka nak salahkan orang lain

Unknown said...

Monty,
Yes it its going to be an all English affair between Man Utd and either Chelsea or Liverpool. This is going to be interesting because they are going to play in Moscow.

Unknown said...

Kerp,
Thanks buddy, I ll get the award and display it in my sidebar.

Unknown said...

kingscupsardin & Savetheworld,
Welcome to my humble blog and thanx for commenting.

Unknown said...

suealeen,
Ya, betul apa you kata. Let them fight and gouge each other's eyes and finally kill their own parties.

Anonymous said...

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What are Politcs?" Dad says "Well son, let me try to explain it this way:
..1. Im the head of the family, so call me the president
..2. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call her the Government.
..3. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the People.
..4. The nanny, we'll consider her the Working class.
..5. And your baby brother, we'll call him the future.

"Now think about that and see if it makes sense."

So, the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said.

Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severly soiled his diaper So, the little boy goes to his parents room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nannys room.

Finding the door locked, he looks in the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny.

He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad i think i understand the concept of politics now:

The father says "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about"

The little boy replies, "The president is screwing the working class, while the government is sound asleep. The people are being ignored and the Future is in deep $hit".

amsran said...

terima kasih
post cikgu memang best!!

rastom said...

Samivel: Itu Toyorudin sudah bikin saya mara. Saya Hindu juga, apa saya berani hantam itu tokong ka? Mana boleh itu macam, itu tokong kuda, gajah sumua itu umur sudah ratus ratus tahun.Sebagai orang Hindu saya mesti juga penjagaan itu tokong sumua. Apala dia cakap itu macam? Dia brani mau lawan saya, tengok apa jadi sama itu Pandithan.

Toyuruddin:Ini you punya problem, bukan saya. you memang tarak reti bahasa Melayu. saya cakap lain you lain juga faham. Bodo punya menteri. Saya suruh habiskan semua tempe tempe yang dalam stok lama tu, tapi u tarak faham, bukan saya cakap temple. Porrah!

Samivel:Dey gigi punya doktor enna soldre? ( sambil goyang goyang kepala )..itu cikgu ada kasi satu idea sama kitala itu wudumbu penternakan. Dia punya khasiat lagi power tau, tengok saya rambut punya mana ada uban? Bukan macam itu cikgu, dia punya janggut pun sudah ada siikiit uban..konjum konjum ada.

Toyoruddin Hoi! ( sambil angkat sebatang penyapu meluru ke arah Samivel)

Unknown said...

el mahico'
Yes, I have read that somewhere and true, politics is a real screw up.

Unknown said...

savetheworld.
Terima kasih,

Unknown said...

rastom,
Can wudumbu curry really prevent grey hairs. the those with grey hairs will konju-konju darken theirs?
What a pity I can't take wudumbu.

Toilet paper said...

Salam Cikgu,

1st time i heard about "wudumbu".
which language was it came from?

sound funny la that "wudumbu"..

haha..

Unknown said...

toiletpaper,
Wudumbu is Samy Velu's language la. Tamil. It means biawak

rastom said...

wudumbu mutek (egg) is another health item i heard, sort of a libidinous tonic, but those creatures are really unsafe now. Barely reach puberty to be hunted for their yum yum meat for some folks.

Unknown said...

ratom,
To me only koli motek, that's all.

monsterball said...

kata tak nak.It can be MU against Liverpool.
Yes. Liverpool needs more than 2 goals... to go into the final....you will never know. They have a great track record in European Cup...and depending on bookies..whether they can buy off Chelsea.
Own by a Russian.and playing the final in Moscow...owner may not throw the chance away..so it will be a non corrupted game....and for that....Liverpool will show their true colours...playing fantastic football..without bribery.

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