Wednesday, 24 June 2009

The Importantation of English

Press Statement By The Ministry Of Education

The Ministry of Education has findinged that the standeds of Inggeris in the county was very low and not very high so after many many considerisationing off this mater, the Ministry has decidinged to makinged Inggeris a compulsion sabjek to the SPM.

The Ministry oso has the realized that more then one tichers are not goods in the Inggeris so The Ministry has making the result to importation Inggeris tichers from far far away county.

Next year, 5 containers of Inggeris tichers from England will be come to Malaysia to starts working to improving the standeds of Inggeris. The Trading Ministry have oredy giving the APs to importation the tichers. Onli tichers without H1N1 will be approved. (hahahaha joking onli)

If this many tichers is never enough, the Ministry will applying for APs to importation tichers from Ostolia, New Ziland and Scottishland.

All the students will oso getting the leptop komputer person by person. Strimik oso will helping the ministry to supplying the students with no wire modem so they all the students can learning the Inggeris by no wire.

The Ministry oso got check the internet to see if got webside or blok good for learning the Inggeris and has reccomendationing many many webside and bloks but cannot go to katataknak becos he not good one.

The Minister say this pograme has costing the Ministry 5 thousands millions ringgit 1 years. He is saying never mind pay so many money becos the produce is also very many and very good for the county.

Tomorrow the Minister of Education will tell the Malaysians peoples about this sabjeks on the telivisyens.

25 comments:

Mike Tan said...

Wah,so diferen oledi man.Last time
spick Ingris they say u "mat salleh buntot hitam" now wan to impot mat salleh to teach Ingis ah!

Kata Tak Nak said...

Mike,
Thats why la they all, I spik Ingis but my buntot not hitam one.

The way I see it, they will make a mess out of this matter because they want to use this as political mileage.

fahmi said...

hahahahah.... leptop? strimik? tichers? compulsion? cannot go to katataknak? hahahaha

cikgu2... always funny... laughing my heart out in front of my leptop la right now cikgu..

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

the ministerial must provide informasion to convinse the malaysians peoples of how impotent inglish are.

Hamba said...

Ini satu projek mau songlap duit rakyat dari Kerajaan Barisan Nasional. Itu menteri pelajaran tarak sekolah punya orang.... Kecik2 pun bodoh sekarang sudah besar lagi bodoh. Lagi besar dia punya badan lagi besar dia punya bodoh. Kalau ini macam aaa..lagi elok hantar budak2 sekolah pegi belajar kat London maaa... mesti satu bulan semua sudah boleh cakap ingis punyaaaa...

Anonymous said...

Cikgu
Betul jugak comment Hamba 12:53pm nun.

kesian teacher dari UK Australia New Zealand Scotland semua sure kena "balon" dalam kontena sebab nak check ada ke H1N1 dalam Apam Apam mereka nun.

Minister Education memang dah lah benggap toye lagi lembab, habis kos buku sekolah dan fees akan naik nak tutup kos bawa masuk Teacher Orang Putih nih.

Kontrak kontrak semua bagi sedara mara mereka yang tak reti bahasa ingerris, atau jawa pun... tapi, bahasa duit kopi terror lah...

lebih teruk kalau Teacher English nih orang muda muda yang tak ganyut, susah budak budak berebut ke Putrajaya nak mintak scholarship sebab buntuit dah bocor sembab, macam mamat sayfool nun.

macam2 boleh jadi you know?

Anonymous said...

LMAO!

ahoo said...

Wealth follows when ideas flourish ! In bolihland, many politicians are just plain idiot BUT with money making ideas. As long as the end justify the mean, there will be projects worth considering and plundering is just another meek word.

Without bright ideas, how to have bloated account ? Thst's the way to tap the gravy train of the govt in the name of development for all people of Malaysia.

ali allah ditta said...

The Minister say this pograme has costing the Ministry 5 thousands millions ringgit 1 years. He is saying never mind pay so many money becos the produce is also very many and very good for the county.

5 thousands millions ringgit 1 years is kacang putih what. The minister is vely,vely hapy coz now minister and flend can make big moni flom the ploglam.Minister and famli can goyang kaki for 7 genelation.

cheers.

Anonymous said...

A very good piece of writing,cikgu - apt and yet funny. Btw, cikgu, you write very very well, interesting yet satirical. I enjoy all your pieces. Keep them coming!

kopitelp16 said...

Another good one. I rilly rilly impress you speak good England. Wlite oso vely good.

With our new DPM helming the Edukasion Depatmen, our students England sure implove one. Passing mark 20%. 50% can get B oredi.

Anyway, I see this as just a ploy to make them look good and try to score some brownie points. It's all political. And to think that they are willing to use our kid's future as tools for their political survival is scary!

Kata Tak Nak said...

fahmi,
Why you laughinged lie dat? You must controlling yourself.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Kerp,
What if he is angry at someone and says "You don't play-play with me, I impotent man you know?
Anyway just last night I heard him speaking on tv and his English is really pretty good la. he is definirely not Double Muhammad or Ali ketam

Kata Tak Nak said...

Hamba,
I always believe that first the decide how much they want to make then only the decide on what project to implement.

Kata Tak Nak said...

anon 14:02
bahagian check H1N1 dalam apam, depa bagi kat Tambi Chik tu.
Now they are smiling from ear to ear thinking of the money they would make from new textbooks and new laptops and new everything.

Kata Tak Nak said...

anon 14:26
I have seen it before but for the love of god I do not know what LMAO means. Could anyone help me out here?

Kata Tak Nak said...

ahoo,
Oh they are idiots alright. Can't find one bright enough to consider listening to.

Kata Tak Nak said...

ali,
That is what ministers are for, to create projects for their fliends and then the fliends give them some. They work you suck my dick, I suck your dick arrangement la..

Kata Tak Nak said...

anon 16:15,
Thanks. I find writing like this is better then being too straight forward but sometimes, I do write serious pieces but 'tak jadi' la.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Kopitelp,
Seriously I tell you, if they want to maintain the present passing rate they would have to bring the passing mark to below 20.

Anonymous said...

Daer Ciku (ticher),

You making me laffing vely much. Now I vely cunfidant tat my ingeris soon sama sama standad as Ciku standad. I thinking new educatation minster Mooyoideen vely cleverer than last minster Hisam-muddy-din to making moniy flom tis improveing ingeris standad ploject. Ciku, you thinking my ingeris can passing SPM or not? My flendss thinking my writing ingeris good good than my speakering ingeris so no ploblem passing SPM, no needing to do lisan testing mah. Can passing or not SPM? Wat you thinking!

Anonymous said...

Salam cikgu,
Watlah cikgu. Like that also dont know kah? LMAO is laughing my ass off.So easy one man. Go to inglish school dont want . Speak inglish also dont want. Now dont know wat is LMAO. Now gomen want to start pojek all must learn inglish. Very impotent ! Evrybody must know inglish. If not how to kompeat with other people. Whao when the amno people gomen want to start projek, fulamak itu bunyi ting,ting,tinglah. Duit sudah malilah!!New projek baru ada duit. Inglish projekkah,PPSMIkah,apa nama itu projekkah semua syok saja. All my cukai money masuk depa punyai poket. See how they spend billion for PPSMI. In the end habukpun takde !! Curse them!! Just my 2sen cikgu .

Kata Tak Nak said...

anon 20:27.
Our Malaysian standard of marking means, you got marks for all the messages you get across. As long as the examiner understands you, you get marks.
As long as your structures, like you have intro, and points written in paras and you have ending, you get marks.
For your grammar of course they deduct marks but your structure and points would most probably save you.

Kata Tak Nak said...

anon: 21:04
I swear I tell you my ticher never teaching me the LMAO all la, but good oso ah this young pipel languich.

If they make the plojek and no make money flom the plojek, they got many sin one. They aflaid go to hell so must take the money then oni go to the heaven, can buy beautiful angels.

~Penang Mali said...

cheGu, those people up there who hold the important positions, they're capable and educated and graduated at least with bachelor degree. And if they joined private sector, they might become successful managers CEO, etc. But why when they hold govt position and made decision, almost all their decision look stupid? Is it because their masters are all stupid and they only follow order from their masters? Or are we that stupid we elected those people to become our representative and become ministers? (although some are not elected by people, still become minister). How can we stop all this? Just my kiuriositi (my english not good la, I can't spell the word)

~Penang Mali

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