Tuesday, 2 June 2009

And the roof came crumbling down.

Reporter: Mr. MB sir, the people are shocked about this incident. How come a Stadium like this could just come crumbling like that? Luckily no one was injured.

MB: Why you all want to ask me? I didn't even know that there is a stadium here. You want to know, you ask this fellow here, this fellow beside me. He was the MB when this was built and completed. Ha, you answer them la. Answer la.

ExMB: Hey, hey, hey why ask me? I am not the MB of this state. You are the MB. you answer la. You are responsible, you are the MB.

MB: Why should I be answerable? You and your gang built it. I don't know how much you all whack for this stadium. Everybody know you like to whack money one but at least build it properly la. What if your father or mother inside there and then the roof collapse?

ExMB: Woi, woi, father mother all don't talk ah. I don't know about this all, you are the MB, you answer.

MB: Okay, okay we ask the reporter here who he thinks is responsible to answer about this. Hey reporter, who do you think should answer to this?

Reporter: I think the both of you should answer. You as the MB must answer in your capacity as the CEO of the state and you the exMB must answer as the man responsible for the whole project.

MB: Where can, where can. Why he pay you money ka? Where can. When they built this, I did know anything about this. Who knows maybe they used clay instead of cement; maybe they used bamboo instead of steel?

ExMB: Hey idiot, where can use clay and bamboo? You think this is your father's house ka? Your father's house means I believe la. I heard people say your father's house is made of cowdung and bamboo only.

MB: You see, you see, this kind of people will blame everybody else except themselves. Now he wants to talk about my father. Wait, wait we ask the State Engineer.

SE: Preliminary checks show that there is nothing wrong with the design and materials used. In fact we found that the Stadium was made with better materials than reccomended. I just received an fax from Siera Leone stating that their geol0gical station recorded a massive underground landslide exactly under this stadium. That is the reason for the collapse. No one is to blame for this. Just nature.

Reporter: Is there anyway to verify what you have just said? How come this was picked up in Siera Leone but not in Europe, Japan and the US where they are more advance?

SE: I think the Japanese, European and Americans are hiding this valuable information because they are jealous of our development. They want to blame the government as corrupt. Luckily we have friends in Siera Leone. Hold on, hold on. I just got message from Zimbabwe, they reported the same thing.

MB: Ha, settle, nobody's fault. Ah, Mr. State Engineer, how much do you think it will cost if we want to build a new one? I want a bigger one la, 100K or 150K capacity.

ExMB: Er, MB, MB, I got a large piece of land in Ulu Terengganu. You want ka, I sell you cheap cheap only. RM392 per square foot.

MB: Wah exactly the number of votes Opah Min got ah. No I don't want, very expensive. We'll build in Kalimantan, land is cheaper there.

17 comments:

kopitelp16 said...

Sweet! Since it's partly collapsed and damaged, now all very happy. Why? 1st, can tender out demolition work. Then, can get another tender out to build another stadium. See the opportunities is difficult times?
I can already hear the money register... kching!!

I wanna submit my company to supply cowdung!

Win win for the contractors and the crooks!

Satu Lagi Projek Barisan Nasional!

frankie said...

With so much wang ehsan going around and being made available, it is a mystery how the roof can crumble at all, unless if the tender to construct the stadium has been subbed thru 392 contractors?

Eh Cikgu, the numbers 392 if rearranged to 932, means money to the kaki nombor ekor.

tokasid said...

che'gu:

I know why it collapsed.

The builders didn't have kepoklekor for tea break.

For a new stadium its gonna be a tug-of-war which might lead to some sms calling for someone to be killed. xMB wants it in Jerteh.Present MB wants in in Kijal. MB wannabes want it in Kuala Berang,Bukit Besi and Pulau Perhentian(where they can organisea marathon orgy.

Anonymous said...

Cikgu
Lawak Cikgu betul betul buat saya ketawa... agaknya itu lah dalam kepala otak MB dulu, kini, dan selama nya ye. duit duit duit. apa nak jadi entah lah budak budak kampung jadi MB. mungkin kalau di beri tanggung jawab jaga lembu dan kambing di ladang kelapa sawit boleh buat kerja bagus kot. kalau tengok muka MB dan bekas-MB, orang dah boleh judge otak nya agak lembab dan toye' punya. kita tengok pula bila pulak hotel monsoon cup tenggelam di muara sungai tu nanti. mungkin bekas-MB tu kata ada hantu laut panggil kot nanti.

macam-macam

BravoEagleHotel said...

Breaking News > Stadium TGG to be build next to Old Trafford .Training allowances will be paid for MB too.Similiar set up beside Carrington trianing base.

ahoo said...

With so many buildings having problem, I think we better reinspect the whole of Putrajaya lah ! Get some foreign experts to conduct professional evaluation otherwise what will happen to us the common people should there be a disaster there with all our top " managers " meeting there so often ?

merandok said...

every time you post, i thought it's the most hilarious..

until i read the next.. keep up cikgu..

ALLAH knows how you help de-stress many tired soul out here.. bless you

Hamba said...

Wah, next time they will build a crystal stadium and another 300 million of trg money gone. Then visitor can come and go sight seeing inside a stadium... and they will see two mangkuk ( one an Mb and the other ex-mb) playing tag you're it. Both keep running and tagging each other not willing to take responsibility for the fiasco. Bodoh punya munkee!!!

Unknown said...

Kopitelp,
Yes, they will give the demolition tender to a cousin or an uncle who uses hammers to bang it down.

Unknown said...

Frankie,
They should have let Opah Min do the work.

Unknown said...

Doc,
Finally someone from Johore gets the job.

Unknown said...

Anonymous,
Memang dah. Yang lama masih terkenang akan masa dulu di mana dia tidoq atas katil duit, yang baru baru dok serononk2 mana buleh bagi kat yang lama balik?

Unknown said...

BravoEagle,
Just imagine Old Trafford is so old and did not collapse. Yang ini masih baru, orang kata kentot masih wangi rupa2nya dah runtoh. Apa lagi yang nak runtoh no?

Unknown said...

ahoo,
I heard Putrajaya is also made of cowdung thats why they all so smelly.

Unknown said...

merandok,
Glad to be of service.

Unknown said...

Hamba,
Hmm Crystal Stadium? With crystal toilets too?

fahmi said...

salam, mmg kelakar... father mother all don't talk ah.. hahahha like a bunch of kids...

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