Thursday 10 September 2009

Detailed Description

At long last they have agreed to be serious about the matter. Thank God for common sense. At last the Penan people, especially, the women folks, are getting some justice. If you read here, you could see how serious the cops are but of course they do need some help to nab those itchy dicks.

All they are asking for are detailed information about those itchy dicks. Now that is not asking too much I think. Hmm I wonder how they would conduct the report. Could it be something like this?

Cop: Okay describe the man whom you claimed to have sexually assaulted you.

Girl: He is not so tall, he err

Cop: What not so tall? Tell me exactly how tall is he. In centimeters .

Girl: I don't know exactly how tall and I don't know what centimeters are.

Cop: You shout here and there that you are raped but you can't describe the rapist. How am I going to help you.

Girl: Sorry sir, next time I will carry a measuring tape every time I walk in the jungle so that I could measure how tall the man is while he is screwing me. Do you want me to measure how long his dick is and maybe the circumference of his balls too?

Cop: Waa, you kurang ajar huh. Okay how heavy is he, exactly how many kilos to the nearest 2 decimal points.

Girl: I don't know how heavy he is but rest assure on my way home I will buy a weighing scale because I am sure when I enter the jungle I would be raped so I would request that the rapist weigh himself first. Do you want his weight with or without clothes sir?

Cop: You are trying to be funny with me ah? What's his name?

Girl: That too I don't know sir, but I think I will have to add a portable photostat machine to the weighing scale and measuring scale that I have to buy so that while he is humping me, I could sneak into his wallet and get his IC and photocopy it.

Cop: I'll slap you if you try to be funny with me again.

Girl: Well what else is new? Don't you want to outdo your friends and throw me out of the window?

Cop: Don't test my patience. How many times have you been raped and what are the days and times.

Girl: Now I have to add a punch card machine to my list of purchase.

Cop: Don't be cocky and answer me.

Girl: Too many times that I have lost count and at no fix time.

Cop: You are not cooperating with me. You have not given me any information so how the hell am I going to be able to help you?

Girl: Why don't you take us victims under protection to their place where we can point them out to you. It can't get any more detailed than that.

Cop: Are you trying to teach me how to do my work?

Girl: No sir, just a suggestion but then I am sure you must have thought about it already since you are a very clever person. What else would you like to know sir? How many strokes did each rape last? The exact colour of his semen? Maybe you would also like me to furnish you his academic qualification, what political party he is a member of and whether his mother had cheated on his father before?


Anonymous said...

Terima kasih kerana meninggalkan cetusan pendapat di blog saya.

Teruskan dengan tulisan inovatif saudara.


Unknown said...

Pak Sako,
Terima kasih kembali dan Selamat Berpuasa

Anonymous said...

gretings n salutations alike.hope u r keeping up well.been a while since u blogged n been a while too since i commented too.heheheh.
anyway nice one today.absolute truth of how this beautiful country of ours is run.Tapi Nak kata apa cikgu? suara rakyat hanya didengar melalui undi.thats all.takde cara lain.may the force be with us!

Unknown said...

Tapi masalahnya undi pos pulak banyak sangat. Mana tau nanti depa buat hal suruh semua kakitangan kerajaan mesti undi pos. Orang yang desperate akan buat apa saja.

romerz said...

I laughed at your post because it was wittily written but in reality I'm sick to the core that this can happen in our beloved country.

If you are interested I wrote a post about this subject in my blog as well. Unfortunately I was not witty enough like you to make it pleasant reading. I was angry and I wrote accordingly.

Let me know your thoughts Cikgu, I'm so angry now that I could do with wise directions before I end up on the wrong side of the law.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

hehehehehe...or maybe the cops should suggest potential rapists to wear a name tag...

Sammy said...

Knowing that this will be a wild goose chase for them without any monetary rewards, do you think they would even bother to follow-up even if they had the details.

Maybe if the victims would organise a candle-light virgil and silent protest would they move in faster, and send more FRU and RDF into the forests?

Unknown said...

Glad that you enjoyed it but I also hoped that you saw the spite with which it was written.

I hate it so much when people degenerate fellow humans, that I can't take.

Unknown said...

If the 00 secret agents have licence to kill then I believe these contractors and their workers have licence to rape.

Unknown said...

Excatly. When I read that the police wanted detailed information, I immediately knew that this is going to be a wild goose chase.

Anonymous said...

Salamualaikum Cikgu
You're back from Umrah is it....??? Good that you're back!

Here link to Aidil Fitri Lagu Raya songs in You Tube....

Take care and Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri to You & Family, alright.


Unknown said...

No not back from UMRAH, its just that during Ramadhan I want to take it easy a bit.

Thanx for the links.

ahoo said...

Cikgu, Teach the police some basic lessons lah! Get the girls to identify those lumberjacks and at the same time get their blood sample for DNA. The babies out of the rape maybe good evidence, no ?

Anyway if they the police have will surely they can have their way but what is worrying is the fact that timber tycoons have slush funds. The poor penans have nothing to offer thus they will be marginalised even more.

Anonymous said...


Relief at last that you posted something.Really worried since your last posting was Aug 28. Thought maybe you had to go for heart checkup. Nearly wanted to put an APB on Zorro's site.

A personal request though, if you have no flowing creative juice to penned perhaps just throw a couple of jokes or one liner every now and then so that your fans can know you are OK

Selamat berpuasa

Golden Boy

Anonymous said...


Relief at last that you posted something.Really worried since your last posting was Aug 28. Thought maybe you had to go for heart checkup. Nearly wanted to put an APB on Zorro's site.

A personal request though, if you have no flowing creative juice to penned perhaps just throw a couple of jokes or one liner every now and then so that your fans can know you are OK

Selamat berpuasa

Golden Boy

Unknown said...

Yes the funds of these tycoons are enormous. Maybe the only lesson is to shaft some sharp branches up their behinds.

Unknown said...

Oh, I have been around just taking a break, will seriously blog again after raya kot maybe earlier who knows.

cakapaje said...

Salam Cikgu,

Glad to be able to catch this posting, though not on what really transpired there. Just as quickly a wind blows over sand, that's how quick this matter will be swept under the carpet by gomen.

ruyom said...

Wrong, Najib.

Doubts about opposition rule is nothing compared to the people disgust at Umno rule.

Your deputy has never heard of 1Malaysia.

Your home minister displays sickening partisanship.

Your judiciary pretends it doesn't know how to read the Perak constitution.

Your MACC goes on baseless witch-hunts against opposition politicians rather than fight real corruption.

Your police force prioritises suppressing peaceful gatherings than fighting crime.

Your AG practises selective prosecution.

julee said...

It seems like Selcat can do better job than MACC. The interrogation was conducted in transparent and professional ways. BN shame on you.

kentanjim said...

You are so damn right. From day one I am still trying to figure out what Najib meant by 1Malaysia. Every stooge in UMNO including his deputy is surely anti 1Malaysia if my interpretation is right.

As for PR, not only the dickhead Zulkifli Nordin, but Hassan Ali should be sacked from the parties for dragging PR through mud, and idiotic stand on sensitive matters.

aston said...

Well written & well said!

UMNO and BN components are rotten by their selfish, nepotism and crony system, injustice, greed, corrupted minds, arrogance, abused power etc, after 50 years in power.

It is time to Look East Policy in Japan to kick UMNO and BN out in GE13. The Makkal Sakti people power by Pakatan Rakyat to rule Malaysia soon!

Unknown said...

The idiot taking the report was trying to sweep things under the carpet la.
They are world champs at it.

Unknown said...

They feel very guilty if they had to do good.

Unknown said...

Law of the jungle is enforced by none other than animals.

Unknown said...

You are right about those dickheads. Well they must be chopped.

Unknown said...

Yeap, its time alright.

monsterball said...

For this..I sympathize with the police officer.
For pleasure of reading and have a good laugh...KTN done it again.


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