Wow, they are now dispensing awards for Federal Territory Day. What next then? Who knows, since the demand for Datukships and Tan Sriships are high, they would extend this exercise to Hari Raya Aidil Fitri, Hari Raya Aidil Adha, Maulidul Rasul, Maal Hijrah, Chinese New Year, Chap Goh Meh, Wesak Day, Cheng Beng, Taipusam, Deepavali, Ponggal, Valentines' Day, School Sports Day and PTA Meetings Day.
The day will come when they will have open tender for these awards. To blind the rakyats, every newborn child's birth certificate will come with the suffix AMN; register for primary school and you will be awarded PJK and once you go to secondary school the PKT would be yours.
Imagine walking into a Nasi Kandar Restaurant and the cashier is a certain Tan Sri Raheemah Bibi. She would be smiling to you with the crimson trickle of sireh juice down the side of the corner of her mouth. She courteously asks you to take a table and in no time Datuk Habibul Rehman from Bihar and Datuk Malek Bacha from Tamil Nadu comes to take your order.
After your lunch, take a cab driven by Datuk Seri Tan Ah Kow to the bank and meet the manager Tun Tiu Nia Mah.
Fancy reading a newspaper report:
Mat Rempit arrested for crashing into traffic cop. Mat Rempit Dollah Jamaluddin AMN, PJK, PKT, 17, was arrested last night for injuring a traffic cop Sergeant Datuk Kumaren at KM 3 Jalan Kucing Last night. According to KL Traffic Chief Tengku Sameon, who was present at a press conference with ACP Tengku Lim Boon Chit and the IGP Tengku DiRaja Kelas 12, Ariif Bedol, Datuk Kumaren sustained serious head injuries and has been warded in the ICU, in Kuala Lumpur General Hospital.
Director of KLGH, Tengku DiRaja Kelas 15, confirmed that Datuk Kumaren has just had surgery and is recovering. He is under the care of Neurosurgeon Tengku Diraja Kelas 14 Milosavic Miloslav from Serbia.
Meanwhile, the Minister of Transport Maharaja DiRaja Kelas 6, Chan Boh Hong said that the government is very unhappy with this development. The Cabinet would meet next Tuesday to discuss this matter. The PM Maharaja Yang Maha Besar Lah Bin Lan will issue a statement after this.
The Social Welfare Board, Da Ma Cai, Sports Toto and Magnum 4 Nombor Ekor are proud to announce that each of them would be conducting special draws for Tan Sriships and Datukships on different days, every 1st and 3rd week of the month. 50 Tan Sriships and 75 Datukships are up for grabs per draw. More details later.