Saturday 12 January 2008

Leaders Opinions On The Crime Rate.

A reporter asked some leaders to comment on the frightening crime-rate. These are some responses.

PM: There is no reason to panic. Our crime rate is still low compared to many other countries. Anyway the figures did not explain one important point. If you were to take away crimes committed by foreigners in this country then the actual crime committed by Malaysians is not that high.

Najib: Yes, the figure may look quite high but crimes involving C4 is very low.

Samy : Mana ada jenayah di lubo raya? Lain tempat kalu saya apa puduli, Tanya lain orang la.

IGP: I have requested to government to build the biggest prison in the world which should be operable by the next VMY.

Adnan: This is a big boost to the tourism industry. We got quite a lot of publicity in foreign countries and I have instructed my officers to capitalize on this.

Sharizat: I have suggested to the cabinet that a percentage of the fines collected from those guilty of committing crimes, be allocated for welfare purposes. I think next year, welfare aid recipients would get a windfall.

Hisham: I had a permit to carry the keris so that should not be mistaken as a criminal act.

Keng Yaik: I spit on people who commit crime.

OKT: Saya telah memberi arahan kepada semua ahli MCA supaya tidak membuat jenayah. Kita akan pasang lebeh banyak cctv untuk mengintip mereka.

Zam: I congratulate you people for giving us a bad name. Why, why, why, why must you choose this to highlight?

Jasin: If the police had taken my advice by closing one eye then we could halve the rate. One eye see less then two, right or not?

Nazri: Something is wrong with our system. We have too many laws. A lot of things are considered crime that’s why our rate is high. If we do away with some laws then there will be less crime. We will make it harder to call an act a crime. Let me elaborate. Giving out of taxi permits indiscriminately should not be considered a crime. Stealing more than RM1000 is a crime, less, not a crime. Robbing with firearms is a crime, with a knife, is not a crime. Raping only once is not a crime, more than that is a crime. Corruption is frown upon but not a crime. If we adopt this then I assure you the rate will go down.

26 comments:

bakaq a.k.a ~penarik beca said...

Cik Gu, may be way too much, but i think this is blogging! Tq for this post, Sir!

Semenjak dua menjak ni, makin menjadi sentuhan hang!

Asil said...

Mahathir: If you want my comment, start a blog will you...

Raja Petra: Hey, visit my site, Malaysia Today. You can read everything you need to know. Police reports, documents - everything. There will be more...

Mawi: I'll start having concerts around the nation. People will forget.

Zakiah Anas (999): My shows look lame, right?

Anonymous said...

I like the comment by Jasin.

However you missed out this one guy....

MohdMohd: Higher crime rate only means one thing - the prestation of pulis department is getting better. Pulis work harder to catch more criminer, so it is only morer criminers cathed than previous time, but actual crime is not morer.

monsterball said...

If you continue like this..my friend kerp is laughing so much..cannot put a post...as he maybe reading this near the toilet.
And MU is back at the top.hammer8ing 6-0 on Newcastle....yet not one goal sored by Rooney....tough luck to him.He did play well..did put few to the net....but somehow Givens raised to the occasion ..against Rooney.THe 3 IGPs..
#1..During my time...anyone breaks the law...I will see that he pays for it..one way or another. I am a lawyer by profession..so don't fool around with me.
#2...During my time....I am all mighty. Everyone knows my background...a welknown gangster before I join the force....real troublesome in school too. The Emperor of Malaysia told me to do my worst..so I punched and kick the bastard. Emperor is happy....that is all I care....to make him happy.
#3..Aiyoo...why me?? I am so contented to get my monthly cuts on bribes..shack up free of charge so many SYT....why make me IGP?
Go to hell with him. I will let crime rates increased to such an embarrassing rate for him...then he can sack me if he wants...that is if he has the balls to do so......I will be happy.
Just watch me do it.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

yes, i am having a ball reading this, albeit the not-so-good result from a gunner's perspective last night. but thats football...it aint over till the final whistle blows.

cikgu, meh aku tambah sikit. dari org selangor utk org selangor.

Md Khir: demi mencapai sifar-jenayah, kerajaan selangor akan berusaha menyapu bersih segala penjenayah.

kahkahhhhhh...

bg bakaq,

jangan tegur. it will only jinx his fine run. hehehehehe...

Unknown said...

Bakaq.
Salah depa sebenaqnya. Depa yang bagi modai kat aku and yes, this is blogging.

Unknown said...

asil,
Terlupa la tentang Mahathir tu.
Mahathir: This is all Anwar's fault. He brings a long a culture of crime. He is a criminal.

Unknown said...

hantutelor,
MohdMohd: I did not contribute to crime in this country, Australia? yes, Malaysia? no.

Unknown said...

Kerp,
I love that take on Khir. You are right, it aint over till the fat lady sings. I had always maintained that the winner would be decided by the outcome of the games between the Big 4 themselves.

Unknown said...

Monty,
I do not know if there was ever an IGP with intergrity.

monsterball said...

Yes you are right KTN..not one have the integrity.....but the present one is giving PM most problems.
PM have no guts to choose the right man without race and religion ever involved.
Indians and Chinese are famous crime busters and sharp guys...yet he ignore...yet he keep saying he never play race politics.
And so glad...kerp is having a balls here.Bookies made a real killing...MU gave 3 goals..all bought MU...half time o-o...then betters got nervous...bought double amount..now favoring Newcastle...6 goals in 45 minutes......hahahahaha...betters got slaughtered...hahahahaha...so bookies lost 90% on first half.....and made 100% on the complete game..and those bola lari betters....all crying...especially from China...but these chinese blokes...never regret...real gamblers....just keep working to cover losses....and start betting again. gambling is born in their blood.
And kerp is right...until the final whistle...no one knows for sure...go and enjoy...but it is all planned..and MU is he worst team for betters...some are thinking how to bomb all of them dead...hahaahahaha

Hi&Lo said...

Sir,

You are great!!!

Former Bar Council chief Yeo Yang Poh: We inherited the colonial law which criminalises blow job.

Unknown said...

Monty,
Well I guess we will have to wait till the end of the season.

Unknown said...

Hi&Lp,
Thanks, but I am not that great. There are many others out there.

tokasid said...

Salam che'gu:

Ali Rustam: Jenayah? itu semua ahli parti pembangkang sahaja.cuba tengok yang masuk ISA sahaja penjenayah dan semua yg masuk ISA adalah parti pembangkang.ana ada org UMNO atau BN masuk ISA?Jadi sebenarnya penjenayah sedikit saje. Ehhh...lupa nak cakap,Melaka akan membelanja sebanyak 5 juta untuk bersihkan Sg Melaka dan kita akan buat river cruise,kita akan jadikan Melaka 75% WiFi dan jangan lupa semua majlis dalam Melaka akan saya rasmi kan walaupun mesyuarat PIBG.

Dan lagi satu,kalau pembangkang tak buat demonstrasi jalanan,amaka tak ada jenayah langsung di Malaysia.

Unknown said...

Doc,
O, rupanya pembangkang la penyumbang kepada jenayah. Ish, ish, ish, jahatnya pembangkang ni.

tokasid said...

Ali Rustam: satu lagi yang jadi penjenayah selain dari pembangkang ialah org2 yang tak setuju babi di pelihara di negeri Melaka ini.Orang yg membela babi bukan penjenayah sebab jika mereka penjenayah sudah tentu polis akan tangkap mereka. Tak ada macam itu kan?
Satu lagi, adalah jenayah jika menuduh orang melakukan rasuah walaupun memang benar orang itu buat rasuah. Rasuah itu sebahagian dari prosedur bekerja kita.Jadi bukan jenayah.

Dan saya nak ulangi, marilah kita beramai-ramai membersihkan sungai Melaka.

Unknown said...

Doc,
Lega dengaq doc kata rasuah bukan jenayah. Kalau tidak risau jugak pasai pemimpin2 yang saya sayangi rasuah. Terkejut la jugak pasai takkan depa yang baik dan wara' ni lakukan jenayah? Jadi kalu rasuah bukan jenayah, depa bukan penjenayah la kan? Lega betoi. Jom kita rsauah dengan depa.

Anonymous said...

Bribery is a crime. Or is it? Corruption is a dirty word, just as politicking is a dirty word. So which one is defined as rasuah? Bribery or corruption? And kind of act is amounting to bribery or corruption. Which act is a crime? What if I bribe someone's sister a lollypop so that he will hand my love note to her. Is that a crime? Or I genuinely helps a person with money when he is in trouble without any intention of giving him a bribe. But weeks later he helps me out of a difficult situation. Is that a bribe, or just a return of favour? Che'Gu, you want this big position, and I am a close friend to the bigshot. I told the bigshot why not put Che'Gu there and he said ok. Later you come to thank me and present me with the Mercedes that I always wanted. That's a bribe or not? Someone please tell me what is a bribery, what's a rasuah.

zorro said...

HILARIOUS BUT THE TRUTH...AND THE TRUTH WILL HURT THEM IN THE GE...

You forgot that bochok guy from Sabah
......."if there is no leak, then Malaysians wont know that the crime rate is so high!"

Unknown said...

Hantutelor
For me, if money or favours is given given to BUY preference it is then corruption by both the giver and the taker.

As for the giving of sweets to a younger brother, there is no guarantee that the sister would agree.

Unknown said...

Zorro,
Yes, the bocok fella.

Bocok: Why all this about crime.l Its an even bigger crime for women to have mensus depriving their men of a good time.

Anonymous said...

LOL. Really funny that bocok fella. That's how they spin each time, it seems.

Che'Gu, bribery doesn't always involve money. In the mild form like when one's child doesn't merit a place in the IPTA an endorsement from wakil rakyat is a bribery. "Pak Man, don't forget ya, tak lama lagi pilihanraya, undi saya la, saya dah tolong ni."

Unknown said...

Hantutelor,
I did mention money or favours and yes you are right about the IPTA part. In the 1st place no, VIP recommendation should be entertained and Pak Man is a bloody fool if he feels he is indebted.

david santos said...

Good posting, Kata. Thank you.
Have a good day

Unknown said...

gud jokes ... anyway, politician ia always a joke!!!

TJ

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