Saturday, 26 January 2008

Almost Ready

Lah: Oi! Rashid, My popularity has dropped so much la now. I have to go to polls. I can't wait. Are we ready?

Ras: Ala, Bang Lah, don't worry la. You give me 1 week and I'll let you know.

Lah: What Bang Lah? When did my father marry your mother? I extended your contract for you to work la idiot not makan angin.

Ras: Datuk, where got makan angin, I've been working day and night la.

Lah: Then, why not ready yet?

Ras: How to be ready Datuk? They all kacau me like hell la.

Lah: Who kacau you? Najib ka?

Ras: Not Najib la Datuk, the opposition. They check everything.

Lah: Last time also like that what but still you can do it? What's so different now?

Ras: Every time I thought I was ready, they bring out new problems. Just yesterday they found out that we have 5078 voters who are more than 400 years old.

Lah: Why you so bodoh one? Why so old? Cannot make it 100 year plus ka?

Ras: Cannot, all the 100 year plus one sudah bersih.

Lah: What BERSIH? Don't use that word la lembu. Even Cak Kun Cak also we all stop playing, now you want to use.

Ras: Sorry, sorry, sorry. Even my grandson's name also they detect.

Lah: How old is your grandson?

Ras: Baru habis pantang Datuk.

Lah: Why do I have to suffer fools la. Why so young? Ayo! Rashid, like this susah la.

Ras: I asked for 56000 new ICs but your people don't want to give, macam mana ni Datuk?

Lah: Who don't want to give? You give me his name. Bloody kacang puteh.

Ras: Datuk, not enough money la.

Lah: What not enough? Just 3 months ago I gave you 120 million, how come not enough?

Ras: Where got 120 million Datuk, he gave me only 12 million. 12 million how to do work Datuk? So many people to feed.

Lah: Bloody basketball, I gave 120 million and he gave you only 12? This fellow also too much already la.

Ras: Another thing Datuk, we cannot have too many voters registered in one house. Yesterday they asked me about that house in Seligi Pasir Puteh. How come one house got 3251 names? Susah nak jawab Datuk.

Lah: You la bodoh, why put so many names? Why no more houses ka?

Ras: That's the problem, no more house Datuk.

Lah: Then create new houses la. That one also I must teach you ka?

Ras: Already 50% of the addresses are bogus Datuk, how to create new ones?

Lah: Alamak, pening la like this. Then what do you suggest?

Ras: I need a few thousand buses Datuk. I need all the Banglas and Nepalese and Indons either in detention or legally working. We must mobilize them.

Lah: Okay no problem?

Ras: But Datuk, they want citizenship in return.

Lah: Give la.


monsterball said...

Had you been a script writer instead of a may have become a millionaire and in great demand right now.
Intelligent.... creative...artistic person you are....and I too love to create like you....and put that in business.
So if you had also been a small time may also earn much more than a retired school teacher.
Plus you don't drink beer like a drunkard..and do not bullshit or talk big like a missed your million chance....but what is a million..if you are not happy and what your are now.
So you did choose the right profession. That's your khammah.
Do take care and be well.....kata tak nak.

Kata Tak Nak said...


but what is a million..if you are not happy and well...

You are very right there. No point having ill-gotten millions if every minute people swear at you.

Asil said...

With all the things that have been going on, he still got balls to start an election, heh?


like Cikgu said the voting process is 150% hijacked and,

Anwar is coming!

p/s: Wonder, how long the election has been overdue?

Kata Tak Nak said...

They may not win big this time but they will still get the 2/3. The opposition should put all differences aside and go in as a united front, that would surely scare the hell out of them.

Imagine if there is no cheating, if the playing field is level, I won't be surprise if they do not get the 2/3 and one or two more states fall.

cakapaje said...

Salam Cikgu,

You are so much close this time, especially about the foreigners being given citizenships. It started in Sabah, although it was not planned to be so. Then it crept into Kelantan, where many Malay-Thai were given blue IC in return for their votes. Unfortunately, most of the Malay-Thai did not vote as required.

Then they brought in the Indons, and now found those that did vote for them initially, have turn the other way. So they now bring in Nepalese, Indians, Pakistanis and Bangladeshis, where the IC is given only temporarily for the voting period.

And the government dare say the opposition is selling the country? ** theirs!

Kata Tak Nak said...

After a few more elections we will have more foreign voters than locals. Who knows one day they will recruit these foreigners in their own country and vote by post?


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