Friday, 24 April 2009

Time off in heaven

God: Hey angels, why don't you all come over and watch tv with me. It's been a long time since we last sat around a nice warm cosy fire and watch tv.

Angel1: You really mean it boss? You mean you're giving us the day off today?

God: Lets make it a few hours off okay?

Angel2: Half a day?

God: Don't push it.

Angel1: Okay, okay, a few hours is better than no hours off at all. These humans are really driving me crazy you know.

Angel3: What channel boss?

God: Hmmm, Just turn to any channel you fancy.

Angel3: What about Channel Bully?

God: Okay, lets see what's going on there. ....... Hey wait a minute, wait a minute, is that a black man in the The White House?

Angel4: Yeah, boss, the people has got fed up of white people so they wanted to try a different shade.

God: So, how's he doing?

Angel4: Too early to tell boss, he's new. A little shaky start but promising.

God: Keep me posted about him please. Next Channel......  Hey I can remember that river but I don't know of no humongous dam being there when I made it.

Angel5: Oh, that place, the old regime has given way to a more modern and robust regime boss. Look at how their bosses dress. They make damn cheap things there boss but the quality leaves much to be desired though.

God: Boooring, next channel.

Angel1: This is my favourite boss.

God: Why so red? Are they fighting? Let me see, is this the place of the White Elephants?

Angel1: You're sharp boss, yes.

God: Go a little south please ..... Hmm they still treat their women as merchandise do they?

Angel1: They service the whole region boss. Good for the economy.

God: Economy my foot. Would you like your sister or daughter to end up in one of those sin houses? Wait a minute, wait a minute, why are there noise signals at the bottom of the screen?

Angel2: Oh, those are distortion signals from the land of Boleh just south of White Elephant land. They are trying to stop us from getting a real picture of what is happening in their land.

God: Do they realise that this Heaven that they are trying to fool?

Angel2: They thought that since they could distort infos to their people, they could do the same with us.

God: Okay, turn on the anti-distortion switch.

Angel2: Right boss.

God: Oh, they have got a young man now. Why is it that his assistant is older than him? Stupid fellow.

Angel2: They are all not too smart boss. Ruthless? Yes. Smart? No.

God: Stop! Rewind for a thousandth of a second and freeze that frame.

Angel2: What boss, why?

God: That dark shadow behind that young man. Can you get an image from that shadow?

Angel2: If CSI could do it, surely we in heaven could do better. Here you go boss.

God: What!!!!! He is still around? Look that man is bad news. He is like what, a few thousand years old?

Angel2: Let me see through our data base. He's over 80 boss.

God: What is that young man doing with that old buzzard? Oh boy, that young man is a gonna.


Anonymous said...

Oh never mind cikgu. The young man said don't worry , we will put the old buzzard in penanti and let's see what happen. Your guess is as good as mine !!! My 2sen cikgu.

Kata Tak Nak said...

It will be battle Royale then.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

short and (not so) sweet from me this time around- brilliant shit!

Mike said...

Thanks Cekgu, I had a good laugh. Dont want to charge ah! Cekgu? No need forms, how about ppview basis.

fatsogigolo said...

"God: That dark shadow behind that young man."

er...chekgu,i'm keep thinking off this phrase la..are they doing doggy or something??kah3...

Kata Tak Nak said...

I know why and sorry.

Kata Tak Nak said...

What charge? Hmmmm, that's an idea worth exploring. I'll have to park the ppview forms at Puspakom then.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Dogie style eh? I don't know I can confirm they do 69

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

aiseh cikgu why the apology la? this was a piece that i had to leave a word or two, not much on the content but its brilliant idea.

so i demand you to retract your apology, or i may have to lodge a police report against you!


Kata Tak Nak said...

Oh no, I am being held at ransom and so for the safety of my family members I am forced to retract my apology.

Thanks pal.

zorro said...

Xquisitely Nazirisque!

Kata Tak Nak said...

Thanks sir.

kopitelp16 said...

Heaven is watching, all right and Hell is waiting for them!

Another great piece....

Kata Tak Nak said...

I like the 'hell is waiting for them' part.


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