Get Smart

He took off his shoes, held his breath, coz he knew what the stench would be like, placed the sole on the panel behind the bottle of bleach, in the janitors room, and a secret door slid open. He looked to see if the coast is clear and quickly stepped into the compartment and the door immediately slid shut.

For the next 10 minutes he stared at the cold steel door as it heads down at top speed. 10 minutes and 120 miles later the door opened and he walked straight into a full room.

Ah, yes, Agent Maxwell. We have all been waiting for you. The chief said while all the while looking at the numerous screens. Max took his seat next to the chief's.

People, I am sorry to have to summon you here in such short notice. I know some of you had to brave danger at enemy lines to get here and to those who perished while trying to get here what can I say, except, they are brave people and the world salutes them.

Yes, chief, what is it that is so important that I had to called from the caves with Osama. You know I was about this close to getting him.

I know Max, but Osama can wait. We'll get him later. I have an even bigger job for you and the rest.

Bigger than Osama? Can't be Osama right, coz he's on our side. Hahahaha, got it, got it?

Max, this is serious so cut the jokes. Anyway none of yours are funny. they never were.

I know boss, that's why I keep practicing but er,er,ermm...... Okay boss, I know, you are not amused.

Max meet Moe, Larry and Curly. They just got here from Iraq. I'm afraid Shemp didn't make it. He hugged a suicide bomber whom he swore looked like his grandpa.

This is agent Bean of MI6. He has just been recalled from Chechnya and that is agent Count Drac. We had to drag him all the way from Romania and he can't stand daylight much.

Hello guys, nice to meet you.

Okay people, I call you here because you will each head a unit for our next job. Kill the lights please. Gentlemen, the map you are looking at is the map of Bolehland. Our intell tells that Boleh will be getting a new leader. This man here will be their new leader.

So, what's so strange about getting new leaders. Every country gets new leaders when the time comes except maybe Italy and Thailand, they change theirs like Newcastle change managers.

This new leader they get is going to be a big threat to the Western World. He has it in him to transform everything. Under him every country would have to stoop to them. According to the Real Lost Bible, which you can get for 2.95 paperback version, he is actually the Chosen One. He would lead the forces of the East against us in the West and would eventually triumph.

What? You mean he is Superman? Superman's from the East? But he's got big eyes?

Max, just shut up. This man here is his advisor. He is Atlantes, Baba Yaga, and Merlin put together and there is still space for Rasputin and Manson. With his help, the civilised world is in grave danger of destruction.

You mean that advisor is stronger than Genghiz Khan boss?

When you get over there, never ever mention Genghiz, Ulan bator, Gobi Desert and any Tuyas that you can think off. You are sure to blow your cover. Err, Mr. Bean. You look like you have a question?

As a matter of fact I do. Do you mean Her Majesty's Throne is under siege?

Not yet but it would soon be, so, you know why this is our number one priority?

Oh no, this is serious and you can bet your last penny that The British Government would do everything possible to terminate this threat to the Empire. I wonder if Mr. Bond is aware of this. He must learn to stop shagging every pretty damsel that he comes across.

Gentlemen. The future of the World and White Superiority is in your hands. You must fight this serious threat. Make use of the media. Run them down. Get them but be very wary of their Minister of Misinformation, a certain Mr. Reyes Orphan. He is a wily character. He could write a PhD thesis on how something is black and than go out in public and screams that it is white.

Boy we have a great fight ahead of us boss.

Yes Max and it is important that we succeed. Europe, Great Britain, Australia and even the Latin World has pledge half their annual budget just for this. We must stop this new Empire from the East from gaining momentum. Max will head the whole thing.