Wednesday, 20 May 2009

The Ambush

Private1: They are leaving the premise boss. 5 men and 3 women.

Boss: Do they have the stuff with them, I repeat, do they have the stuff?

Private1: Yes boss confirmed.

Boss: Are you sure?

Private1: Yes boss, our mole walking beside them has confirmed by sneezing boss.

Boss: Sneezing? Did he go to the US recently?

Private1: No boss.

Boss: Alright, all men in position. Air cover, are you ready?

AC: Ready boss, we are circling the area. Do you want us to blow them up?

Boss: No, I repeat, no, do not open fire. We want to nab them with the stuff.

Swat1: Swat one waiting for instruction sir.

Boss: Your position?

Swat1: We have cordoned the whole eastern approach.

Boss: Swat 2, come in, where is your position and how many men do you have.

Swat2: We have secured the northern and eastern position boss. 82, men sir. Artillery ready sir.

Boss: All units, wait for my orders. I do not want anyone to escape. Whatever happens, the Red Metrojaya Plastic Bag must not be allowed to change hands. Okay, Air Cover move in and drop the net, NOW.

AC: Moving in boss. Net dropped, and parachute unit deployed.

Boss: Swat1 and 2 move in. I want minimal civilian casualties. Get the Red Metrojaya Plastic Bag.

Swat1: Halt or we shoot. Down, down, down, on the road. Hands behind your back. Sergeant get the beg, get the beg, now.

Sergeant: Down, down or I'll shoot. Give me the bag. Boss, I have got the beg.

Boss: Cuff all of them and let our mole loose. Bring the bag and their leader to me.

Sergeant: Boss, the beg. Kneel down you terrorist. Do you want me to shoot this scumbag boss?

Boss: Good job sergeant....... Do you thing you can carry out your mission? Get ready for a long stay in Kamunting. I hate traitors. Sergeant, get all of them into the truck.

Big Boss: Congratulations Colonel. I'll make sure you be promoted for this. Syabas. Where's the stuff.

Boss: Thank you sir. Sir, the stuff sir.

Big Boss: Yes, we got them. Wow, real quality stuff. With these candles in our possession, they can't have their illegal vigil tonight.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

try this instead as it is not too difficult to have another sort of silent protest.

have small groups of perhaps only 5 people everywhere simultaneously wearing black t-shirts imprinted with wong chin huat's 1BLACKMALAYSIA, DEMOCRACY FIRST, ELECTION NOW.

all these groups scattered everywhere simultaneously from wet markets to coffee shops to shopping centres.

then the police will need to be more creative to make arrests. surely even the joe public who are apolitical or who couldn't care less about perak will at least have an inkling of things going on.

someone should also come out with a simple but catchy tune that all protesters can whistle instead of sing out in words. i personally suggest whistling NEGARAKU while these small groups do their protests all around the nation.

from there on ... it will be proven that we are living in a POLICE STATE.

Anonymous said...

Hahaha this is hilarious!

Anonymous said...

If got blackout macam mana? Cannot use candles? Nanti ISA'ed

kopitelp16 said...

If blackout throughout the country, the police station in Brickfields will be the brightest place in town!

I'm a happy man if I'm a Mat Rempit in Brickfields area. No cop on street, just in Balai waiting for instruction to Tangkap, Tangkap, Tangkap!

Robin 2 Hoots said...

What do they do with the candles? Shove it up their ass?

Robin 2 Hoots said...

Correction.

What do they do with the confiscated candles? Shove it up their ass?

cakapaje said...

Salam Cikgu,

Ain't it a sad affair that the cops are more concerned about the candlelight virgil than actual crimes being committed all over. Its no wonder they have been remarked equivalent to those wearing black and with swastika on their arm.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Anonymous,9:33
That needs a lot of planning but it could work.

Kata Tak Nak said...

anon:12:35,
Thanx

Kata Tak Nak said...

anon 13:27
Then we raid the police store la.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Kipotelp,
Let us all rempit there.

Kata Tak Nak said...

Robin 2 hoots,
Who knows it is pleasurable to them?

Kata Tak Nak said...

shah,
Do you think they have bottomed out? Oh, no, they have more hideous tactics. They never cease to amaze.

peng said...

That is a brilliant description of our 'chicken' you-know-who!
(I got to be discreet, lest they organize a swat for you!).

Kata Tak Nak said...

Peng,
Shhh, don't let our identities be out.

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