My Brother is Gone

Its all over, he passed away at about 5.30 this evening. I just got home for a while to change and do other needfuls before going back.

On Monday, I received a call from my sister in law saying that he was hospitalised again but this time at the Kepala Batas Hospital. She said that he looked very runned down so she was worried. The doctors told her that his cancer was in such an advance stage that all they could offer was to make him a little more comfortable. They did tap his stomach to drain about 1.4 liters of fluid and inserted a tube through his penis to drain his bladder.

On Tuesday he was at his antics again. Maybe because he felt a little better, he was demanding to go home. He was so insistant to the point of being almost violent. So they had no choice but to discharge him. I don't blame the hospital, it was his choice. At home last night he was quite ok. In fact he did strike a conversation with his wife and the new groom although he was quite unaudible most of the time.

This morning I called my second brother to enquire and he said that my brother was still sleeping which was quite unusual. My brother did say that he was a little worried coz my eldest brother did not seem to response to their calls. A few minutes after that I received a call from my second brother saying that it was ok, he was responding.

Then at about 11.30 I received another call from my second brother asking me to go over there coz he seemed to have deteriorated. I could only leave at about 12.15. I was in his place in half an hour and I saw him lying down, with his head propped against 2 pillows, his mouth opened and he was almost struggling for breath. When I saw him I knew that the end was near but kept it to myself.

At about 4.30, the new groom went to the porch where I was sitting saying that he and his elder brother had decided to call for an ambulance. I was taken aback but I understood their concern. Though I was not for it I did nothing to stop them. At about 5pm the ambulance arrived. I was in tears when I saw them struggling to get him into the stretcher. Not once did he open his eyes. He was still still struggling for breath. They put him into the ambulance and went off followed by my nephews in their car. My sister in law was with my brother in the ambulance.

I told my second brother that this is the last time he will see my eldest brother alive in that house. We were chatting when the phone rang and true enough the report was my brother was no more. I was expecting it, I knew it would happen sooner or later to which I prayed that it would be sooner but I still could not control myself. I got out to the porch, sat on a settee and cried like a baby.

We were told that he died on arrival, probably in the ambulance itself. The whole process in the hospital did not take long and his body arrived home at sometime after 6. He looked peaceful, a far cry from the struggling look I saw about an hour or so earlier. This time I couldn't care less if there were people around, I just emptied my eyes. Tears were flowing freely. I did call zorro to tell him about it coz his is the only phone number of fellow bloggers that I have. I did also tell him to inform Monsterball. Many may see him as a rougue but I see him as a friend and brother.

Now I am here typing my heart out while waiting for the missus to get prepared for the trip there. This time a lifeless body would be waiting for me and while typing this last line, I am crying again.