I think, I trully think they are serious about changes. I really do because I have info that they have realised that if they do not change they have won their last election.
Actually their think tank have been working real hard since a week after March 6 and presented their recommendations to the MKT during the recent General Assembly. I heard, I can't really say its 100 percent true, but I heard the new line up in an emergency meeting had, after a much heated debate, voted to endorse the changes recommended by the think tank.
I also heard that a few diehards had threatened to resign from the party but after much persuasion and threats, they finally, grudgingly accepted.
So get ready folks cause the sarkas party that will emerge after this is going to be a spanking new party.
Just a few of the changes that I managed to wring from my informer are:
1. Change the font used to type the party's name from Arial to Calibri.
2. Their anthem will be sung at a slower, less threatening, pace.
3. The term 'Presiden' will be spelt 'Prasiden' to make it sound less English.
4. Fridays will be declared a Proton day so none of their people are allowed to drive Mercedes.
5. Their people are only allowed to eat at 5 Star hotels 6 days a week. On Fridays they must eat breakfast at home while lunches and dinners must be at 4 Star hotels or below.
6. They are not allowed to polish their Mercedes and BMWs more than 12 times a year so that these vehicles could spot the 'used' looks.
7. 5 percent of the furniture in their bungalows must be local while the rest could be imported.
8. Their bungalows must not be more than 8 storeys high and their swimming pools must not be bigger than olympic size.
Well opposition people, there goes your chances of winning the next election.
Actually their think tank have been working real hard since a week after March 6 and presented their recommendations to the MKT during the recent General Assembly. I heard, I can't really say its 100 percent true, but I heard the new line up in an emergency meeting had, after a much heated debate, voted to endorse the changes recommended by the think tank.
I also heard that a few diehards had threatened to resign from the party but after much persuasion and threats, they finally, grudgingly accepted.
So get ready folks cause the sarkas party that will emerge after this is going to be a spanking new party.
Just a few of the changes that I managed to wring from my informer are:
1. Change the font used to type the party's name from Arial to Calibri.
2. Their anthem will be sung at a slower, less threatening, pace.
3. The term 'Presiden' will be spelt 'Prasiden' to make it sound less English.
4. Fridays will be declared a Proton day so none of their people are allowed to drive Mercedes.
5. Their people are only allowed to eat at 5 Star hotels 6 days a week. On Fridays they must eat breakfast at home while lunches and dinners must be at 4 Star hotels or below.
6. They are not allowed to polish their Mercedes and BMWs more than 12 times a year so that these vehicles could spot the 'used' looks.
7. 5 percent of the furniture in their bungalows must be local while the rest could be imported.
8. Their bungalows must not be more than 8 storeys high and their swimming pools must not be bigger than olympic size.
Well opposition people, there goes your chances of winning the next election.
27 comments:
Classic!
You are like the Cantona of political satire... Genius!
Salute!
Had a good laugh reading this post, thanks!
*lol* what a MAJOR changes they are going to make!!!
YOU RULE CIKGU!
splendid write up.keep it up.
Dear Cikgu,
I always drop by your site for a good read plus good laugh to pick myself up after feeling depressed reading the political news in other sites.
Do keep yourself in good health so that your readers will continue to be tickled by yr stories. Hope you follow the diet plan and cut-down on the sugar.
Si nakal.
Jesse,
You are too kind.
Tzy Wen
Glad you liked it.
mem-Besar,
I was taken aback myself at the massive change they are undertaking.
anon 22.41,
Thanx
anon 1.17,
Thanx, will take care of my sugar intake.
Anything on SPA, GRO, Dangdut ...
D'ayo,
My informer withheld info regarding that. I think they are recommending these activities to held in neighbouring country's only.
Cikgu, as I read the first few paras, I thought you are serious, deadly serious!
Ha! Ha! You had me, but only for a split second ok?
This is a darn good piece. I hope Umno read this and adopt the changes, then opposition will lose la! Ha! Ha!
Cikgu,
Allow me to potong line...
Peng,
FYI, UMNO read nothing
Another classic! At first I really thought that you really had some inside info. You made my day!
Way to go!
hehehehe...classic KTN la cikgu.
and if i may add- money politics are now exclusively for those still in favour by top people. if you're a has-been, you're as good as guilty.
Peng and D'ayo,
I think peng knows that UMNO people don't read anything without $ sign in it.
kopitelp,
I am a man without any connections, nada, zilch, mote.
Kerp,
You are found guilty of not being highly connected and sentence to the house of the poor.
There was this band called "nothing" who used to do gigs in the underground music scene a few years ago.class act.the drummer was joe skate, a local malaysian skate hero.the band band never made it big and were labelled as underachievers.
You are a class act urself though in a different field.They should make u a principle.Y arent u there anyway? do u consider urself an underachiever?
Walau Piang... chegu... your best yet... Change You Can Believe In... ala dUMbNO style..
Eh.. chegu.. waiting for your take on Shit Hamit's efforts to glaze PM2B balls by problaiming no Atan-tunyah!
kelakar la abg cikgu ni...cheerz
Chegu... Yang Musa Sheih Fadzir tu claim yang Ameno sekarang sengket tak ada duit macamana? Dia kata delegate tughun KL kena share 7-8 orang satu bilik, betui ke tu? Depa marah laa tu, ha ha.
anon 21.54,
I wld prefer to be a plain teacher. I had a few years experience as a senior assistant and ended up with HBP so its better to be an onery teacher.
I don't know if I am an under achiever or a non achiever.
Malaysian Joe,
Hamit wld have to use his glazy head to polish them dirty balls.
sharleen,
Kelakar ka?
Mat Salo,
Those arseholes who share 7 or 8 to a room are not delegates. They are hangers on, those who felt very important when the Ketua bahagian cramped them in like sardines and treat them to the dinner for 10000 people at the end of the do.
The delegates are well taken care off.
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