Tuesday, 24 July 2007

Its Been 2 Months Already

I was tinkering with the music player of my phone when I found a track that read Track 4 - Unknown. I played the track and the familiar sound of Carlos Santana's solo on Black Magic Woman suddenly arrested my attention. The first thing that I could visualise was my late brother with a microphone in hand and eyes closed. His thick long curly hydrogen peroxide bleached locks were blowing in the wind and fans were screaming.

Yes, my late brother was a singer and he was pretty good. He was also good with the guitar but not good enough to be a permanently featured guitarist. When he was younger he was one hell of a looker and may I add a Casanova. He was many times mistaken for a Mat Salleh for he had no Malay feature at all. Only when he opened his mouth would his race be revealed. Oh how I wish I am the kind who collects photographs.

Yesterday was exactly 2 months to the day my late brother left us and I can't help thinking of him. I just came back from Raden's blog and she was talking about her late mother in law and it reminded me of my late brother more. Just a few minutes ago I received two empty sms from my late brother's number. I called back and my niece apologised. She said that Masha, my grandniece, my late brother's only grandchild, was playing around with the phone.

I still see him when I am alone. I see his smiles and I see us talking together. I remember how he used to tell me stories about his work and exploits in his younger days. I remember the dinners he used to take my family and I for whenever we visited. I remember his fondness for mutton and how whenever we visited, mutton is a must for lunch. He loved to dine and money was no object when food was concerned.

For someone with only a decent result in his MCE, he sure worked his way up the ladder. He joined a Hong Kong based factory in Prai as a trainee technician and was sent to Hong Kong for a 3 month training stint. From then on he worked his way up. When the Japanese bought over the company his rise was more meteoric. He was already a manager in his 30s. Then he went to Matsushita where he ended up a General Manager for one of the departments.

What gave him the edge was his work ethics. He was completely different from. I do at times take mc just to rest. Whenever I fell sick, I would definitely get an mc. He on the hand had never taken an mc for about 25 years before he retired but in those times he had been warded quite a number of times and had surgery once. How did he do it? He took his annual leave. Even when he was hospitalised, he would use up his annual leave and never the mc given. I remember when he had surgery for hernia, he left for work the very next day despite being ordered by the doctors to rest.

As far as work ethics was concerned, he was a carbon copy of my late father. I can't remember my father taking more then a day off at a time. I don't think it is any wonder that they were similar coz amongst us siblings, he was the one who had the most Pakistani feature. My second brother do look Pakistani but the Malay in him do show. My sister and I on the other hand have the most Malay feature. We take after our mother a lot.

My late brother died exactly 29 years and 1 day after my father. They both had liver cancer with my brother outdoing my late father with an additional complication, that is liver cancer. Both died with only 1 grandchild and both died relatively young. Whatever the memory is, I still think of him.

22 comments:

zewt said...

know it feels... the feeling of longing will always be there. it never goes away... which can be good sometimes... means they will always stay in our memory.

Nak Tak Nak said...

zewt,
Forgot that I am not the only one who had suffered this type of loss. Yes, you are most right. Its a pity that we human have to lose something to realise that it means a hell of a lot to us. We simply take life for granted.

Cik Kema said...

Al-fatihah :)

Nak Tak Nak said...

cik kema
Thanx for visiting and thanx.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

cikgu, your brother was a great guy no less. his perseverance proved that if there's a will, then there's definitely a wider road ahead to ease the journey up.

Al-Fatihah to arwah.

2 thumbs up for this entry.

Nak Tak Nak said...

Kerp,
Thanx, and hows your blog coming. Glad you decided to plunge into it. I agree, he was one special person. The sad thing was that it was only when I knew he had stage 4 cancer and knew that he had not long to live that I realised how special he was.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

thats always been the case cikgu. i took my pal for granted when he used to live a stone's throw away. now he's far away i wish i cld hv done more then. its human nature i guess.

new thing always gets extra attention. maybe thats wat been happening wit my blog. i can never thank u and the rest enough for the support i get.

tokasid said...

Salam che'gu:

Innalillahi wa inna ilahi roji'un( kita digalakkan baca ni setiap kali teringat pada keluarga atau kawan2 yg dah pergi dulu dari kita).

Yes its been 2 months. And I remember you writing not to write about him unless it was something important. Alhamdulillah, this entry (and the departure of Raden's MIL and mokk's heart attack) made me think about my destiny.
TQ che'gu.

Hi&Lo said...

Che Gu,

Your bro left behind a legacy. He might not be well-known in public but the hearts he had touched, he did not die in vain.

Thanks for sharing this side of you. I see you are human.

Nak Tak Nak said...

kerp,
Yes, anything new attracts attention at the expense of things old. The new kid in town invites stares. I must learn to appreciate things, everything.

Nak Tak Nak said...

Doc,
Yes, doc I did mention that I won't write about him and go on with my life unless it is important. This time I am constantly reminded of him in everything I do or see or hear so I should write coz it just needs to be written.

acciaccatura said...

salam che gu,
Al Fatehah untuk arwahnya.

Nak Tak Nak said...

hi&lo,
Yes, I am human. I am sometimes angry, and sometimes jovial but I am all flesh and blood with emotion. I appreciate life and miss the dead very dearly. I have tears and am not shy to shed them. I have principals and am ready to die defending them.
Yes, you are right, I am human.

Mat Salo said...

Chegu...

I think you have done a great job of keeping your brother's memory alive. He seem's a cool dude and from what I gather was loved by all and sundry. That is my wish too - to be loved by all and sundry and remembered with fondness..

It's alright, Chegu. Time will heal everything, Insya'Allah.

A great post, BTW, Chegu! It seems fitting for a proper eulogy to your late brother I think...

Anonymous said...

Dear Che Gu,
Ive been away from BM for many many years and just to refresh my mind abit...I dont remember his name but your late brother was that fair, 'mat salleh' looking guy with wavy shoulder length hair that use to sing with the band called "cross street"?
Sorry if my question offended you.
kimasapi

Nak Tak Nak said...

Kimasapi,
I am not offended. Yes, he was Mat Salleh looking, with wavy hair that exceeds the shoulder but he use to sing for the group The Rockers. He may have performed with cross street, that I don't know.

Nak Tak Nak said...

MS,
Yes its time for a Eulogy but I am not very good in writing Eulogies. I will find the time though and really search my soul.

Anonymous said...

My belated condolence to you.
Semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat.
Ameen.

kimasapi.

Nak Tak Nak said...

Kimasapi,
From the bottom of my heart, Thank You.

zabs said...

Salam Che'gu,

AlFatehah untuk arwah. Berbuat baiklah dengan semua orang yang beliau sayangi, selain banyak berdoa untuk beliau, semoga ini akan menambahkan lagi kesejahteraan rohnya di sana. InsyaAllah.

Nak Tak Nak said...

Zabs,
Terima kasih

Raden Galoh said...

Che'GU...Al-Fatihah utk arwah..selagi boleh kita kenang kita kenag...hanya itulah yang tinggal buat pautan...

Saya merasi apa yangChe'Gu lalui...

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