To,
The Government of Malaysia.
Dear Sirs, (Tuns, Tan Sris, Datuk Sris, Datuks and Neneks)
I am a Malay and according to Perkosa, I am entitled to many privilages. So let me get to the point so as not to waste you time as well as mine.
I would like to propose the following deals and if you do not want to suffer the wrath of Perkosa you'd better agree. My proposals are as follow:
1. The government of Malaysia sell my company all parcels of land belonging to the Malaysian government.
2. Lease to my company the Petronas Twin Towers.
3. Award my company the double tracking tender and extend the distance to Turkey.
4. Sell my company all government shares in all GLCs.
5. My company be given the tender to award titles such as Tun, Tan Sri, Datuk Seri and Datuk. You can keep the minor ones. A nominal fee of RM1.00 per award would be paid to the treasury for use of whatever seals needed.
6. All new government tenders and projects must receive my company's approval.
7. To finance all of the above, the government must give my company access to Bank Negara without any interference from either the Governor or any other personnel.
Please reply within week or Perkosa would be angry.
Yours Melayuly
..........................
(Inspired by this.